Sisters, neighbors, coworkers, moms, yoga/running friends ... all kinds of Girlfriends

Here's the girlie-girl way of looking at it ... You have pumps, tennis/walking shoes, platforms, boots, sandals, flip flops, Crocks(tm!), etc. in your closet, right? Guys may look at is as just a room full of shoes and think that they are silly and unnecessary. Women see it as the basics of getting dressed and feeling good about your personal style.

In the girlfriend world, there are close friends you've known since school or new neighbors on the street. Women you work with to friends of friends you've met and run into at the grocery store. Coworkers who become friends outside of work and women you see at yoga or book club. Look around and you'll most likely see a variety of girlfriends at different stages of friendship, with unique qualities and a variety of things in common. It's a wonderful world of girlfriends! Kinda like having a selection of shoes - you have lots of options for women with whom to share your life.

Still in Minnesota visiting friends, I had dinner with my girlfriend Amy last night. Amy is dating, I'm married. Amy has a corporate job, I'm entrepreneurial. Amy lives in the cold north(!), I live in the mid-west. She's a world traveler, I dream of being (and have had some very fun international adventures with her!). But get us together and we have so much in common and so much fun.

What type 'shoe' is her friendship??? Last night after dinner I thought about that. Our conversation ranged from her recent dating adventures to my entrepreneurial dreams. From common friends to philosophies on perspectives of life. I very much respect her opinion, welcome her advice and appreciate her friendship.

Our interaction reflected what I feel is so important about girlfriends and why I started Girlfriendology. I think if we girlfriends 'put our heads together' and help each other through life, that we all learn and benefit from each other. After talking with Amy, I felt stronger for having her support and friendship. Not that we focused on any negative issues but life can be stressful. Together I felt we each contributed problem-solving ideas or creative solutions to hopefully benefit each of us in reaching our dreams. And, thinking like shoes, (and I hope she sees this as a compliment!) to me our interaction was kind of like workboots. Very functional and productive, the "git-r done" type interaction that I love and benefit so much from.

Have a problem? Talk to a girlfriend. Want to do something fun? Call up a girlfriend. Need to laugh or share a great story? Go see a girlfriend. Stressed over life? Have dinner with a girlfriend. Together we make a great pair (or lots of pairs, like that shoe analogy!). After all, aren't girlfriends the perfect accessory?! Thanks Amy for being such a great girlfriend and for sharing life (and solutions/ideas!) with me! Big hugs!!!


p.s. If you're into the above shoes, you might be a "Desperate Housewives" fan. They're on Seenon.com.

Why a Blog? And why Girlfriendology???

Research indicates that women NEED female friendships - and that having girlfriends reduces stress and even makes us live longer*. The goal of Girlfriendology is to inspire, appreciate and celebrate girlfriends across the globe. In fact, I believe that having friendships with women in different areas of our city or the world makes us care more about them and be more compassionate, caring, peace-minded and involved. (And what better way to connect long distance than the world wide web?!)

Research also shows that women are catching up with men on internet usage and that we communicate online differently than men. (Dah!) We tend to share more of our lives with each other through email and blogs. Women's friendships are growing through the previously male-dominated internet. Combine all these facts and a blog is the perfect way to share stories, inspiration and ideas for female friendships.

Personally, this Girlfriendology blog has raised my awareness and appreciation of my girlfriends. Updates are inspired by the wonderful women who influence, interact with and care about me. (And I have more inspiring women than even time to blog about you all!) Only a blog can capture the on-going lessons of life and special moments with girlfriends which caused me to start Girlfriendology in the first place!

So, THANKS GIRLFRIENDS for inspiring me and for reminding me why it is so important to make sure we give attention, time, love and support to our great girlfriends.

Do you have female friends who have impacted your life? From giving thoughtful gifts, to cheering you up, to being a fun friend to hang out with - girlfriends make our lives special, happier and even healthier. Call up your girlfriends and get together. Then come back to Girlfriendology and share stories! Celebrate the amazing girlfriends in your life!

* Read more about this: The Tending Instinct, by Shelley Taylor

.

If you're creative or 'crafty,' stop by GirlfriendologyToo for the creative side of girlfriends! I'm just growing this site of 'the creative side of inspiration, appreciation and celebration of girlfriends' and I welcome your creative comments!

Guaranteed Stress Reliever - seriously!

It has been a stressful week. Employee/boss issues (not fun!), having too much to do and not enough time to do what I really want to do (build Girlfriendology!), and family challenges combined for an elevated stress level.

UCLA researcher Shelley Taylor (author of The Tending Instinct) and her team studied stress in women. (Previous studies were only on men!) They found that oxytocin is released with stress. For men, the response is 'fight or flight.' For women it is much different. Women react to stress with a need to 'tend and befriend.' We want to tend to our young and be with our girlfriends. (My oxytocin level was HUGE this past week!)

Thursday night was our monthly women-only book club. We shared appetizers, desserts, sangria and some (albeit minimal!) discussion of the book. Mostly we 'befriend' each other. Our conversations cover new restaurants nearby, houses bought/sold on the street, funny stories of kids, helpful things like a good handyman or special event in the neighborhood. If the windows are open, our laughter is heard several houses away. We even share sad, difficult news - because life is that way too sometimes.

At the end of an always fun evening, we return to our homes with tales of neighbors and community updates. 'Magically' my mind had left the stressful work worries and other challenges. I was renewed in my passion for creating Girlfriendology and hoping to help women build community with each other - as a priority and a fabulous biological characteristic of women.

I didn't get The Tending Instinct on the book list for next month, however I did experience the stress relief that comes only from being with my girlfriends. Thanks wonderful women of East Hyde Park for reducing my oxytocin level and for being the kind of girlfriends who really make this community home.

Get Well Wishes ...

My fabulous friend Cathy is recovering from surgery. I got the message it all went well, but I can't wait to talk with her and get her version of that! I hope she is resting comfortably, that her family is taking great care of her and that she has good drugs when/if she needs them.

How have you tended to a girlfriend who has been sick? Have you written cards? Visited? Sent or delivered flowers? Showed up with a can of chicken soup and a couple chick flick DVDs?

Great girlfriends deserve pampering and I'd love to do that for Cath - and hope to when she's up to visitors. Let me know what you've done (or had done for you) for taking care of your girlfriends. Be well, dear friend!