TIP TUESDAY #11 - Girlfriend Packing Tips

It's a little late for me, I leave tonight for Frankfurt, but we got some great comments to our travel tip request last Tuesday. So, let's stay on this little travel journey together. This week's TIP TUESDAY question is:

What packing tips do you have for traveling? Maybe it's traveling alone or with the family - what do you do to make it easier, tighter, better - with everything you need??

Again, a little late for me, I'm taking too much I'm sure to Frankfurt and Paris, plus I need to have some room for things we'll buy there. (We get to spend a day in Paris just 'trend shopping'!) I'm just concerned I have the right shoes and warm enough clothing without taking my HUGE coat!

I'll check in from the road but please share tips among yourselves!

P.S. Again, I'd highly recommend any travel books by Marybeth Bond. Listen to her podcast for great girlfriend or personal travel tips. Check out her web site for the "Gutsy Traveler" and her travel books for women!

Girlfriend updates, podcasts, teleseminar, travels ... busy week!

I love hearing from my girlfriends. Updates on their lives and their family, job, pets and social activities. I love knowing what they're up to and how they spend their time. I feel closer to them just knowing their schedules, their shopping finds, funny things their kids do/say. Even if, like today, it is a stressful update of a child in need of a miracle, I at least know what's going on and will keep her family in my thoughts and prayers. Any update from a girlfriend just helps me connect with them and I love that.

So, in an effort to reciprocate, here's the update from Girlfriendology Headquarters (aka: my very cold basement home office!):

1. The new podcast is posted with the December Contest Winners. Listen in for great stories on being thankful for Girlfriends - you'll be inspired. They share so openly and express their girlfriend appreciation. And congrats to the winners of the contest prizes! (But, aren't you all winners?!) Enter the January contest and take your girlfriend out for Starbucks on Girlfiendology!

2. I spoke this weekend with Dr. Karen Gail Lewis, a respected psychologist on relationships. She is amazing! She's written books (like her latest, With or Without Men: Single Women Taking Control of their Lives), conducts Unique Retreats for Women, etc. We'll interview her for the podcast on Valentine's Day but I wanted to make you aware of a special teleseminar (for single women) she's giving THIS WEEK! Check out her web site for all the details!

3. And finally, this time tomorrow evening I'll be on a plane for Frankfurt (then on Friday will take the train to Paris). As much as I'm thrilled to be going (I love travel and especially international travel - on an expense account!), I would much, MUCH rather be going with a girlfriend (or two, or three!). I'll try to check in via the blog from the road but will have to see if WIFI is easily accessible in Europe.

So, I won't be on the blog much in the coming week but I'd love if you'd still read, comment, share, forward, spread the word on Girlfriendology. It is a wonderful world - so much so because of the women who bless our lives. Thanks for making it a wonderful world for me!

And, because I just found it and it seems to fit my journeys and love of girlfriends, here is a quote from an old issue of O magazine on friendship:

"For happiness she required women to walk with. To walk in the city arm in arm with a woman friend (as her mother had with aunts and cousins so many years ago) was just plain essential. Oh! Those long walks and intimate talks, better than standing alone on the most admirable mountain or in the handsomest forest or hay-blown field (all of which were certainly splendid occupations for the wind-starved soul). More important even (though maybe less sweet because of age) than the old walks with boys she'd walked with as a girl ..." Grace Paley

Thanks girlfriends! Bonjour!

GNO, Girlfriend Get-togethers, Laughter and maybe some Wine!

When visiting Minneapolis recently I had dinner with my friends Amy and Kate and two of Amy's girlfriends. Over soups and wine to thaw our chilly bodies, were conversations, laughter, sharing and caring - the kind that warm your soul and remind me how special female friendship is to me. It was a fun, low-key evening where, I believe, everyone left feeling wrapped in 'girlfriendship.'

The current Girlfriendology Contest is about Girl's Night Out (GNO), Girlfriend Events (birthdays, showers, celebrations) or just Girlfriend Get-togethers. It doesn't have to be a formal event with invitations, special attire or limos. Getting together with girlfriends can be casual or dressy, festive or reflective, lots of friends together or just two girlfriends catching up on life. What matters is that time is spent together, that friendships are grown and we can be ourselves with women who love us for who we truly are.

What is your favorite GNO or girlfriends event? Was it a special birthday or dinner in the home of a girlfriend? Was it just coffee together or a much needed walk-talk? I'd love to share your ideas, stories, amusing tales - from recent events or even times growing up when you spent quality time with your best girlfriends and how those memories make you happy. Share - you'll inspire others. (And, join the contest and win Starbucks gift cards so you can take your girlfriend out for coffee on Girlfriendology!) Have fun girlfriends!

TIP TUESDAY #10 - Girlfriend Airport Travel Tips

Monday and Tuesday this week found me in Atlanta (and airports in between). Next Tuesday I head for Germany and France which means more airports and an even "longer time to hang in the sky." (Sorry, some old John Denver line!)
So, this week's TIP TUESDAY question is:

What tips do you have for airports and flying?

Don't get me wrong, I generally LOVE airports. The energy, the people watching, the movement of people on a mission going somewhere with a whole bunch of strangers, the interaction and conversations, the anticipation of 'time travel' to a different destination ... it is a luxury that I recognize and appreciate for the opportunity.

However, there are also the long security lines, even longer transports to terminals, super tight seats, waiting on the tarmack, delays, unexpected changes in plans ... the spectrum of life's ups and downs (literally) all in the space of a few hours between destinations.

My tip is to walk. I walked from Check-in at Delta in Atlanta through the underground tunnel and back and forth on Terminals A, B and C yesterday. It helped me occupy my time, gave me lots of people watching opportunities and helps me feel better for the snacks I consume (in lieu of a real meal!). I get energized from airports, inspired by the different people who's path I cross and sometimes even blessed by smiles and random acts of kindness along the way.

Share your airport travel tip. Selfishly, I can use it before next week's international flights. Hopefully others can share and benefit from tips so we help each other have safe and enjoyable journeys, or as my Dad called it 'traveling mercies.'

P.S. For great girlfriend or personal travel tips, check out the podcast with Marybeth Bond. She is the "Gutsy Traveler," and the #1 Women's Travel Expert. From places to visit to how to pack, shop, dress, etc. Marybeth's the expert. Check out her and her great travel books for women!

Spending time with Girlfriends - like Carrie, from The Diva Cast

At our girlfriend dinner on Wednesday night, my friend Judy stirred and stirred her mixed fruit. She had more pineapple than other fruits and she couldn't mix it enough to make it look, as she said, "interesting". That's kind of how it is with a girlfriend group. You need some diversity, some difference in opinion and age, women with different backgrounds and lifestyles. Combine these together and you definitely get interesting.

Stir up five fun, fabulous, forty-something females from Atlanta, GA and you get not only interesting, but you get life, laughter, love and all kinds of conversations. CARRIE RUNNALS, one of The Diva Cast, spoke with me yesterday for our weekly Girlfriendology Podcast.


The Diva Cast is a podcast with Carrie and her Diva girlfriends Sharon, Suzanne, Julie and Amy. They discuss real life issues like marital counseling and sex, and interview authors and experts on all types of interesting subjects. Listening in is like overhearing a really fun conversation at a nearby table in a restaurant - only this way you're allowed to laugh out loud and share it with your friends!

Carrie shares her passions with Girlfriendology - for her friends (Divas and others), her family and her love of writing and books. Recently she started Words-to-Mouth, a blog and complementary Internet talk show introducing readers to authors beyond the printed page. Even with her busy Diva life (being a mom, wife, writer, investor, Podcast Diva and now with Words-to-Mouth), Carrie graciously spent time with Girlfriendology talking about her girlfriends and living life with passion. Listen in - you'll love listening to Carrie!

So, like that fruit salad, mix up a bunch of your girlfriends together and see how interesting the conversation gets!

P.S. It was great to talk with Carrie because she has become a girlfriend of mine from finding Girlfriendology online and recommending Girlfriendology to friends, mentioning it in interviews, etc. (Thanks Carrie!) She demonstrates to me the beauty of female friendship - where we help each other. Just think how wonderful the world would be if we all supported each other with friendship, ideas, assistance! Go for it!

Girlfriend Get-togethers - time with friends

Is your schedule stretched to capacity? Overwhelmed with your To Do list? Exhausted just thinking about what all you have/need to do? Or am I the only one?

Right now I'm stressed. I want to spend time on Girlfriendology but I have multiple jobs right now - not including home responsibilities, taking care of the new pup, etc. I have to set boundaries on my time because it is just such a valuable, limited commodity at this point in my life.

This week was hectic at the job (and I haven't even taken down the holiday decorations yet!) but I knew spending Wednesday night with my girlfriends was a priority, no matter what. My girlfriend group was getting together at Paula's candle-lit home for a salad pitch-in dinner and to catch up on life. Ruth Sara was still in town which was perfect! Judy climbed up the street to make it. Joyce was new and Debbie was back after a hiatus. (Becky and Melody were sick - hope you're better soon! Tina is moving her dad this week. We missed you!)

Six women gathered around the table to share a meal and our lives. Connections were made (like Joyce and Debbie realizing they had a very personal connection at a funeral three years ago) and plans were set (future dinners together, running into each other on an upcoming trip, etc.). The food, a contribution 'salad bar,' was perfect for New Year's diets (even with all the treats Paula tempted us with!).

However the real nourishment was to our female spirits. We laughed, teared up, shared our frustrations, disappointments*, goals, secrets, joys. My stress floated away in the positive energy in that special home. It was a healing evening. A hopeful gathering. A female 'family' who do life together. And I don't know what I'd do without these caring, beautiful girlfriends.

Are you stressed? Dealing with life? Who better to 'do life' with than your girlfriends?! This month's Girlfriendology contest asks for your comments on Girl's Night Out events or just Girlfriend Gatherings. Please share. Your ideas and advice will inspire others. And think how much better life would be with less stress and more time with girlfriends!

* Caroline Cheshire of HealingBaskets.com shared great advice for caring for friends in her recent podcast with Girlfriendology. Listen in for advice on how to help your girlfriends deal with life and be the girlfriend to them you want to be.

Helping Girlfriends Heal - New Podcast with Caroline Cheshire

Unfortunately we all know women who are dealing with struggles - divorce, cancer/illness, taking care of aging parents, losing jobs or losing loved ones. I have several girlfriends going through 'stuff' right now - Dana and Allison are both on chemo and dealing with their treatment options, Lisa (aka: LL Cool J) just lost her aunt (and a friend of mine), Beth and her husband have separated ... just look around and there are people hurting and struggling.

As a girlfriend, how can we help? CAROLINE CHESHIRE not only lost her baby several years ago, but she also lost some friends who didn't know how to talk to her after her miscarriage. This, and seeing the difficulty that some people have in supporting their friends and family through trying times, inspired her to start HealingBaskets.com. Her passion for people and helping us help each other during situations like divorce, losing a job, being a care giver, etc. has lead to a web site with great gifts and gift giving recommendations for our friends and family in need. She shares insight into what to say and do (listen!) and even what to NOT say or do. Great girlfriend advice for times when we need a girlfriend to help us do the right thing.

I had the honor of speaking with Caroline (and her beautiful British accent!) for the Girlfriendology Podcast. I was impressed with her thoughtfulness and inspired by her genuine passion for helping us help others. She's a women whose business is about making it a better world, one relationship at a time. (Which is exactly the same goal as Girlfriendology!) Thanks Caroline for sharing and for making us better girlfriends through Healing Baskets! (Tell your girlfriends about www.healingbaskets.com!)

TIP TUESDAY #9 - What's your girlfriend tip for a healthy life?

Did you make a New Year's resolution to lose weight? Eat more healthy? Exercise more? (I did, as I sit here on the internet while the treadmill sits idle!)

So, this week's TIP TUESDAY questions are:

What do you do to stay in shape and healthy? What exercise or diet plan seems to work for you? (What can you stay with longer than the first few weeks of January?!)

For me, walking is the best exercise program I can maintain. I walk on Saturdays with some girlfriends. Pretty soon we'll train for the half marathon (to walk, not run!). I do enjoy my treadmill when I have good reading materials and have the time to spend on it. And, I need to write on a calendar what I do to hold myself accountable!

What do you do? Please leave a comment. Maybe you'll inspire other women to stay healthy and happy in 2008!

P.S. Interested in more info and a very interesting, informative interview? Recently Emotional Eating Coach Ellen Shuman talked with me on our Podcast about 'healthy at any size.' Listen in! Not only did we talk about being healthy but also the healthy relationships we can have with our girlfriends by not allowing negative body image influences.

Vote for favorite Girlfriend Story (from Dec. Girlfriendology Contest)

Sure the primaries are starting, but we'll have a whole year of election news. So, here's your opportunity to VOTE for the best Girlfriendology Contest Submission for December! The request was to write in your best girlfriend story. And, for the first time, YOU are invited to vote for the best story!

The top five prize winners will each receive a Starbucks gift card and, the top overall winner will also receive a Girlfriendology Journal. (In addition, in December we had the "Great Girlfriend Gift Giveaway" so 31 books/prizes were given away to 31 women who submitted stories!)

Drum roll please! Please vote on the COMMENTS button below or send an email to ideas@girlfriendology.com. Here are the top 10 entries:

(1) When we moved to our new house we didn’t know anyone in the city. Fortunately we found a house by a very nice woman who made me feel right at home. Janet would bring over food, invite me to dinners with her girlfriends, pick up our mail when we were on vacation, etc. It really made me love the neighborhood because I had such a great friend and neighbor.

(2) I moved a lot growing up and each time was more difficult as I got older and needed girlfriends nearby. When I had to move my senior year of high school to another state, my friend Rachel stayed in touch with me with phone calls and letters. She kept me up to date on all my other friends, what I was missing, what she was up to. I know it was a simple thing but it meant the world to me – that she valued my friendship and that she genuinely missed me. She was a good example of friendship to me.

(3) I am so thankful for my friends because they are so thoughtful. I have started Weight Watchers and they are so very supportive of me. They are always asking how things are going, how much weight I have lost, and just how I am looking. They make me feel good. One of my friends even makes her snacks now so I can still enjoy eating snacks with them when we have our "ladies night out". I think that is so considerate! Friends are always there for each other, and know when you need the extra love. We help each other through things.

(4) I worked in an ER with three other great nurses. We recently all took jobs in different hospitals but have managed to make a point to get together 1-2 times a month for dinner. As you can guess, our jobs are very stressful and we all have children and are married. We range in ages from 26-57. I'm thankful that I've found these wonderful girlfriends to share my life stories with. We agree that your job can suck the life out of you but girlfriends are there to breath the life back into you. We all feel re-energized after getting together for laughs, sometimes tears, hugs, and the promise that it won't be long before we see each other again!

(5) My best friend and I grew up together. From the time we were seven years old we lived two houses down from each other. I was nicked named her 'Shadow' because every where she went I went. We are both 39 years old and live on two different coast but we still talk once a month. It's like I still live two houses down from each other. We are still best of friends to this day!

(6) Right now I am so thankful for a girlfriend who has sent gifts, encouraging emails and cards after cards while I recover from an ankle fusion. It has been rough but only her and my sister have stuck with me through it all on a regular basis. Others only ask when they see me out. It means so much to hear from her weekly.
(7) I could not make it through the holidays without my sister, who has been such a friend, and the church secretary, who has listened over and over again to me. I am still recovering from surgery. All I wanted was to be able to make my divinity I make every year for my Mother for Christmas but did not think I would be able to stand and make it. Today I made two batches and was able to send my Mother, who will turn 79 on New Years Day, her divinity for Christmas. This means more than any gift I could get.

My Church Secretary has encouraged me over and over as I've struggled because I could not decorate for the holidays but I am managing to do some goodies. So I don't know what I would have done without these two and another Lady friend of mine who emails and keeps in constant touch.

A person recovering from a surgery and dealing with wheelchairs, walkers, crutches and constant changes needs girlfriends. I also faced a scare of breast cancer in the midst of all this. So I praise God for these three friends.

(8) I am thankful for my girlfriend Sherry because we are identical twins and are so much alike that I can talk to her about anything and she understands. We have been best friends since the womb so we have a bond that can never be broken.

I am also thankful for other dear friends like my friend Sue who I have been friends with since High School. Even though we live far apart we still keep in touch and are there for each other during the bad times as well as the good. Girlfriends truly are a gift that should be treasured. One that is priceless.

(9) I am SO thankful for girlfriends! Without them I wouldn't have the job I do today! My friend Chris and I LOVE to craft. During law school we joked and joked that we would love to create something called Arts and Crafts Law so we could somehow practice law and craft at the same time. Well, law school passed and she went back to work for the government and I went to work for the government and corporations. She NEVER forgot our conversation.

As time passed, I began to meet clients that had a need for my services. So many wonderful and talented artists began to encourage me. I lost my job with my big firm and was devastated. When I called my friend she said "Remember that conversation we had in law school? What is stopping you from finally practicing Arts and Crafts Law? You have created it you know."

Her encouragement (along with my other girlfriends) allowed me to pursue my dream. I am so thankful because girlfriends listen AND REMEMBER!

(10) I love my girlfriends. Each one is totally unique, and yet we're often so much the same. We all have our strong and weak points, and as girlfriends, we encourage and tolerate those points accordingly. Some remember your birthday, and some still love you even if they forget, but no matter what happens we ending up staying girlfriends.

Why do I love my girlfriends? It's simple. It's Girlfriendtelepathy. The ability to communicate and exchange critical messages non-verbally. It's the raised eyebrow and half-smirk that you exchange with her when a cute guy walks in. A wrinkled nose and an eye roll when he says something cheesy.

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So, who do you think has the best girlfriend story? VOTE!!!

Girlfriend Entrepreneurs Club - should you start one?

Tina is a interior/pillow designer. Judy is a techie and writer (with a talent for poems and being funny). Joyce is creating a shop for heirloom gifts for children. Paula and her daughters started a catering business. Helen (who joined us for the first time today) is working on a book and a new source of income. (Becky, "the Kitchen Goddess", and Melody, the Tupperware Manager Maven couldn't join us - but we missed you!) And, you know me, I'm dedicated to building Girlfriendology - a place for 'inspiration, appreciation and celebration of girlfriends.'

We're a diverse group - some are neighbors who've known each other for years, some are new friends and new entrepreneurs. We meet monthly to help each other grow our businesses and see our dreams become reality. And, to assist each other with challenges we struggle with, but also very much to celebrate our successes together.

WE ("Women Entrepreneurs," what WE call ourselves) met today to not only explore our dreams and businesses, but to discuss how our group can best benefits each of us. One part of our discussion this morning was men - should we allow them in the 'club?' It was a tough decision because we don't want to exclude other entrepreneurs who need a group to help them with their businesses. To be honest, I crave the unique strength, energy and support that I receive from women entrepreneurs - things that I very much benefit from and value. Nothing against men, but men and women communicate differently and, to me, it just seems to work best in an environment where WE 'speak the same language.'

Are you an entrepreneur or someone with a dream? Perhaps you should start a girlfriend club to help and hold each other accountable toward reaching your dreams. I'd highly recommend it as much for ideas and support as for the camaraderie and community. Not an entrepreneur? Start a Mommies group or book club, a group of girlfriends to go to dinner or bowling every month (or monthly GNO - 'girls night out'), a knitting night group or scrapbook 'sistas, take classes or experiment on gourmet recipes together. Just do life together. And who better with than your girlfriends?!

TIP TUESDAY #8 - 2008 Girlfriend "Goals"

Happy 2008 Girlfriends! I hope the holidays were happy and that you enjoyed great times with your family and friends. The festivities and social plans may be over - so hopefully there is time for us all to look ahead to a great '08.

From being an entrepreneur for several years, I recognize the benefits, and need the structure, from goal setting. It helps me focus on the important 'stuff and make sure I commit my time and efforts to what I really want to happen. As I alluded to in the previous post, I also think this is good when it comes to friendship. Not that it is a forced mandate or a cold, clinical approach to what should be a warm, personal relationship. But, it does help to have goals for your time - be it professionally, personally (family and friends), physically (health-wise), etc.

So, this week's TIP TUESDAY question is:

What are your girlfriend goals for 2008? Is there a particular girlfriend you need to focus on to help her or be more of a friend? Do you need to make time for your girlfriends or to meet new friends?

In addition to setting goals as a good way of making changes in our lives, I know that it makes me more accountable if I share them with someone. (That's why I have a couple girlfriend mastermind groups who challenge and encourage each other to reach our goals.) Having a very full schedule and not a lot of cash, I know a realistic goal for me has to be simple, yet heartfelt. I commit to sending Thank You notes to my girlfriends in 2008. I want to be a better friend by acknowledging how much my girlfriends contribute to my life and make sure that I tell them how special they are to me.

What are your goals? Please share and check back in with updates. Girlfriendology is about inspiration, appreciation and celebration of girlfriends. Consider goals of inspiring others, showing your appreciation or going out of your way to celebrate your friendships. 2008 will be great - with your girlfriends by your side!

What are YOUR girlfriend resolutions for 2008?

It's 11:28pm on Dec. 31. I should be cleaning for our brunch in the morning or helping my husband cut/saute veggies, but I'm not. I'm going public with my '08 goals - which, to be honest, is kinda scary. What if I set goals and don't hit them? What if they go by the wayside and my friends know?

Well, fortunately, my girlfriends understand and trust me to do what is the best thing. Unlike some, they support my dreams and encourage me - even when they don't always understand what I'm doing. Tina, Jill, Lisa, Katie, Julie, Cindy, Paula, Becky, Judy, Dana, Barb, Deana, Rhonda, Laurie ... too many to list. They know me, they trust me and they support me.

If this was my version of "It's a Wonderful Life," it would show what my life would be like without the love, support and encouragement of my girlfriends. I'd ignore my dreams and stay in a job that doesn't thrill me. I'd settle for things and I'd never stretch myself. My life would be in black and white, never living in 'living color' or reaching my potential.

I dream of 2008 as a year of striving for that - for my dreams, my goals, my mission in life. I want to be a better girlfriend - to remember birthdays, give meaningful gifts, to make my girlfriends feel as special as their friendship is to me. I strive to be thoughtful like my friend Terri, giving like Becky and supportive like Tina. I want to be the type of friend that I so appreciate like Barb, learn and laugh with like Jill, that helps their girlfriends like my mentor group of Katie and Lisa.

What would your life be like without your girlfriends? With whom would you share your dreams, fears, stories? How would your life be different? Think about it and you're sure to further strengthen your appreciation of girlfriends!

Thanks to all of you - and thanks to you whom I don't know, but who are friends to others with your support and encouragement. I hope 2008 is a time of friendship, actually 'girlfriendship' - and that your dreams come true. Happy New Year Girlfriends!

Girlfriends Advice for New Year's Eve - guest columnist

I remember my single days and trying to make plans so I wouldn't be alone on New Year's Eve. It can be stressful or it can be a great time to get with girlfriends and others. Our guest columnist has more insight into this potentially 'unHappy' New Year...

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OH NO! IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN, by Dr. Karen Gail Lewis

Single women (always been single and single again by virtue of divorce or death) tell me the two days they hate the most are December 31 and February 14 -- New Year’s Eve and Valentine’s Day.

Why? Because in our society, these are days specifically designed for people who have a special someone in their lives. They have become noted for lovers, people with partners, who will wine and dine them, gift them, spout poetry and love songs to them.

No doubt, you have noted that New Year’s Eve is coming up. Who says, though, the typical images of dancing beneath the stars, snuggling in front of a fire, kissing under the mistletoe are the only possibilities? Who says you have to see New Year’s Eve as an evening for lovers?

In my clinical experience with single women, I hear how painful this night is. Janice, an 'always single' woman told me, “I hide out, eating myself into oblivion while watching old love stories. Then I cry myself to sleep. I hope next December 31 will be different, which only makes me more miserable, since I recall having said that last December 31.”

Charleen, a divorced woman with three grown children, has a slightly different take. “I cry myself to sleep New Year’s Eve – after hours of remembering how wonderful it was in the early years with Jack, and later after he left, with my kids. We had such fun. I don’t miss him, but it’s really painful missing the fun and the closeness we had watching the ball drop. Now, no kids and no man. I HATE December 31.”

This year, try something different. Take charge of defining what New Year’s Eve should be. Be gentle and loving with yourself. Make it a gentle and loving evening, whether with good friends over or by yourself.

For instance, design this night for your closest women friends. Have everyone bring food and positive stories from the year that is ending. Have them bring items representing something they are looking forward to in the upcoming year. Forbid the mention of that three-letter word (men) - this evening is just for women you love, and for your hopes and plans for the coming year -- ones under your control. (It’s fine to dream about men, but you have no control in making an emotionally appropriate man appear in your life.)

Another example: Invite a group of friends over – women and men, couples/married and singles. With the exception of romantic newlyweds, many couples would be delighted to join you; they don’t have the same compunction singles do to have a “romantic” evening. Enjoy playing games, singing songs, telling stories. Be silly if you want. It’s your night; design it as you want.

For those who really want to be alone, make it a pleasant evening, not a hide-away or pity-party evening. Have your favorite dinner, listen to favorite music (avoid romantic songs), read a book or watch an old movie (not romantic ones). Plan a winter vacation, with friends or alone, something to give you pleasure. Consider a fun and life-changing weekend, like Unique Retreats for Single Women, joining like-minded singles for a new perspective of being single in a world that values marriage. However you choose to spend the evening of December 31, 2007, don’t let society’s prejudice about singles besmirch your night.
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For almost four decades, Dr. Karen Gail Lewis has been a marriage and family therapist with a specialization in singles. She has authored numerous books including With or Without a Man: Single Women Taking Control of Their Lives and its accompanying Workbook. Dr. Lewis also runs Unique Retreats for Women, with specifically designed weekends for single women, women ready for change, women married to powerful men, and women with their siblings. Her next teleseminar for single women begins in January. To contact her for information about this and your FREE 16 Golden Rules for Being Single, go to DrKarenGailLewis.com. Thanks Karen! And a HAPPY New Year to all of you girlfriends!!

TIP TUESDAY #7 - Favorite gift you received from a girlfriend this holiday

First, forgive me. This is TIP TUESDAY - on a Thursday! That's what holidays and a new puppy will do to a girl! (The pup is great - I just want to spend all my time with him while he's still a pup!)

I just read some 'blog marketing' articles and one mentioned that your blog needs to 'provide a solution.' Well, if there is one thing girlfriends do for each other is provide solutions - we help each other through all kinds of problems and situations with creative ideas and recommendations. So, we're right on track with TIP TUESDAY (especially when we all share comments!).

Girlfriends ARE gifts, so we'd like to hear from you for this week's TIP TUESDAY question:

What is your favorite gift you received from a girlfriend this holiday?

I love hearing others' comments so that I can improve my gift giving skills - so
please add a comment - we want to hear from you!

I'll start ... My creative friend Jill gave me a meaningful book for creative women (so I know I'll love it!). Terri, my always thoughtful friend, gave me some "olives" (that are really chocolate covered almonds, since she knows I don't like olives but I do like chocolate and almonds!) as well as Eat Pray Love, another book I've heard about and need to read. My friend Tina gave me a beautiful pair of earrings to replace the ones I bought previously that I lost one of - how sweet was that! (Other girlfriends gave great gifts too - THANKS to all of you - especially for the GIFT of your friendship!)

What do all these gifts have in common? They were specifically selected for ME! Did your girlfriends do a great job of finding gifts that were perfect for YOU? Share your COMMENTS and help us all be better girlfriend gift givers!

What do you do when the holidays aren't happy for your girlfriends?

I love the holidays. Even though it is a very hectic, crazy time of year, I love the lights, get-togethers with friends, anticipation of a New Year. All this energizes and excites me. Receiving cards from long-time friends, trying to find/make special gifts for friends and family, Christmas Trees, Silent Nights ... to me it is wonderous time of year.

To some of my girlfriends it isn't. One of my girlfriends is having a really rough time. Her husband just lost his job, and in his 60's, they weren't ready to retire. It puts so much strain on her. You can tell it by her eyes, her attitude, her whole composure. Another girlfriend (from college) dropped me a change of address card - because she and her husband are separated. And yet another college girlfriend and her husband are living apart this Christmas and unsure of what 2008 will bring them. Some girlfriends are dealing with cancer, chemo, not feeling their happy, wonderful selves.

I feel for my girlfriends. For the stress that the holidays can bring combined with the uncertainty and, possibly fear, that 2008 won't be so great. I wish I had words and ways to make it all better. I wish I could give them 'hope.'

Dear Friends who are hurting - please know that you are loved, valued, admired, trusted and beautiful. Your friendship is a gift, and for that I am so thankful. I pray that you do find hope - that you appreciate the things that you do have, that you learn through your experiences and feel stronger for having done so. Even if you can't feel happy or healthy, I wish for you a peaceful holiday and a 2008 where you find love, laughter, joy and hope. Thank you for blessing me with your friendship.

Do you have a girlfriend you need to care for? We're here to take care of each other. Reach out and tell them that you love them, that you're there for them and that you'll still be there throughout whatever life brings along. Be a friend. Bring hope. Share love. Peace.

Cheesy, I know. But puppies do bring happiness. Meet our new little one (coming this Saturday) - Meet Brando. Named in honor of our Stella. I wish I could give you all puppies!

TIP TUESDAY #7 - Favorite Book(s) to give or receive from a Girlfriend

All of us have special interest, hobbies, passions - right! That's what makes us interesting, creative, fun and fun to buy books for! So, I thought it would be great to hear from you on Tip Tuesday for the best girlfriend books. The Holidays are a great time to give books as gifts - especially when you give books that perfectly match your girlfriends' interests.

So, this week's TIP TUESDAY question is:

What is your favorite book(s) to give to a girlfriend?

Please add a comment - we want to hear from you! Tip Tuesday questions always make me think of my ideas, so I'll get us started. Without giving away any specific gifts I'm giving (since my girlfriends read this!):

My thoughtful girlfriend Renee gave me this book, I read it and passed it along to my friend Lisa who will then read and give to another girlfriend - Law of Attraction, by Michael Losier

My girlfriend Katie Hacker (who just inspired us on our recent podcast) wrote this book and donated several for the "Great Girlfriend Gift Giveaway" (and I just bought one for my niece!) - Hip to Bead

Our first podcast featured best-selling author Kris Radish who has written several great girlfriend books. I'd definitely recommend any Kris Radish book. (I highly recommend "The Elegant Gathering of the White Snows" about women who just start walking and talking - great book!)

Author Cathy Hamilton (the Boomer Girl) is going to talk with Girlfriendology for a special New Year's Day podcast. Her creative words have formed so many great Cathy Hamilton books - like the Girlfriends' Bible, Boomer Girl, Momisms, etc. (Great girlfriend, mom, sister, coworker gifts!)

Other books I've given in the past or enjoyed receiving: The Success Principles, How to Get from Where Your Are to Where You Want to be - by Jack Canfield. (Actually I've given this and love having it on CDs that I listen to often.) Another podcast girlfriend - the Crafty Chica herself (Kathy Cano Murillo) - Art de la Soul - Glittery Ideas to Liven Up Your Life. Other ideas?

Look for more books and share your ideas with girlfriends! You might just inspire a gift from one of your girlfriends!



Happy Holidays Creative Girlfriends!

Katie Hacker - a girlfriend who inspires me (and also you!)

Do your girlfriends inspire you? One might be a runner or walker, so you decide to do a half marathon. Another girlfriend may be a wonderful chef, which inspires you to try new recipes. Your knitting girlfriend teaches you and soon you're a knitting girlfriend too! I love that about girlfriends. Together we have more fun, learn more and become more 'ourselves' through our female friends.

My girlfriend KATIE HACKER is inspiring. She has written more than 20 craft books including Hip to Bead, Katie's Basics of Beading and 30-Minute Beading. She also presents Beading Lessons on the PBS show Beads, Baubles & Jewels, is a columnist for Simply Beads magazine and teaches workshops at national conventions like the Bead & Button Show. Although her specialty is beading, she does lots of other crafts as well and she has some great ideas for crafting with and for your girlfriends.

Listen to our NEW podcast with Katie and she'll inspire you - to craft for and with your girlfriends, to make time for your friends, to connect with your girlfriends through the internet and just to be more comfortable with your own creativity!

Check out Katie's blog for updates, creative ideas and her recent Ornament Round Robin (where creative women all made ornaments and share their ideas - the final one will happen this Thursday).

Do you have girlfriends who do inspire you? Please share with Girlfriendology in our December CONTEST - which asks for stories on girlfriends you're thankful for. Please share. Spread the girlfriend gratitude! Honor your girlfriend by telling others how much she inspires you! (and win prizes in the Great Girlfriend Gift Giveaway!)

Ornament ideas - Girlfriends linking together

My girlfriend Katie Hacker is a beading superstar. She has written over 20 books, writes creative columns in beading magazines, teaches classes at national shows and on PBS (Beads, Baubles & Jewels), etc. More than that, to me, she's a superstar friend. She is part of my girlfriend mastermind group (along with the wonderful Lisa Galvin!) and just a fun friend!

This week she invited me to participate in a round robin blog event where a bunch of girlfriends have shared crafty ideas for making ornaments. I posted mine on GirlfriendologyToo (the blog for the creative side of girlfriends) but some may have posted to this site - sorry for the inconvenience. If you'd like to see a list of over 20 ornament idea links, visit GirlfriendologyToo.

Katie is that kind of friend - who will help me promote my site, who will include me in fun events, who is there for me as I grow my business. She is a young mom with a beautiful daughter, amazing creative talent, unlimited kindness and wisdom past her years. I'm very blessed to call her friend.

You'll have the opportunity to hear more about and from Katie on the next Podcast. We'll talk this weekend and share it with you. Come back and here her comments on crafting with and for girlfriends, how she maintains girlfriendships even living in a rural community (she and her husband have an organic farm too) and other bits of wisdom from this creative, fun, kind friend. Thanks Katie!

TIP TUESDAY #6 - What's your advice for holiday cards and letters?

If you receive our Girlfriendology newsletter, you know WHO is our upcoming January 1 Podcast "Boomer Star." She's creative, funny, inspiring and you'll trust her. She gets girlfriends, especially those of the boomer variety!

Do you ever wish someone would tell your friends and family the truth at the holidays? That there might be a better way of doing things, but of course you can't say anything because you'd never want to hurt their feelings. Well, let our Jan. 1 podcast star tell them for you!

Read her article on writing holiday letters, then send it along to a friend. And, while you're being honest and sharing, please also comment on this blog for your thoughts on:

What tips for holiday cards and letters do YOU have?

Should they be short? Long? Lots of photos? Do you want/need to know their medical abnormalities or thoughts on if stone-washed jeans will make a come back? Interested in their favorite reality shows and their family outing to the local zoo?

Here's your chance to share your thoughts, then share this blog with girlfriends who may need it or just will enjoy it!

And, while you're sharing, don't forget to mention our December Girlfriendology Contest and Great Girlfriend Gift Giveaway! We'd love to share a prize with you, just for telling us why you're thankful for your girlfriend(s). We're thankful you're here!

My Favorite Girlfriend Gift ...

For the November Girlfriendology Contest, we asked: What is your favorite gift to give to, or receive from, a girlfriend?

I started thinking about my favorite gifts for and from girlfriends ... scarfs Dana has knit for me, jewelry Terri gave me, a beautiful plant from Deana and a thoughtful 'dog angel' sculpture this year when our golden retriever died, how Barb let me live with her family for six months when we were moving ... lots of girlfriend gift memories hug me with love from my faithful and fabulous female friends. I am truly blessed.

Lots of inspiring stories came in for the contest. Several won prizes - like a Starbucks gift certificate to take their girlfriend out for coffee on Girlfriendology. Not everyone could win prizes so we came up with the "Great Girlfriend Gift Giveaway" for December. These inspirational insights deserve to be heard and celebrated.

And heard they are ... the Podcast with all the great girlfriend stories is now online. Listen in for stories from Cherie, Beth, Rochelle and Unita. Get ideas from Robin, Christine, Jenny, Heather and Veronica. Inspired? I'm sure you will be, and hopefully you will be to the point that you share in our current Contest and "Great Girlfriend Gift Giveaway." This month, being a season of gratitude and love, we ask what girlfriends you're thankful for and why. Please share. You'll inspire someone else to be a better friend. Think of the ripple effect that could have! Thanks Girlfriends!