Back to the 'real world' - but with my girlfriends!

Making it back from Paris in less time than a full day at work is pretty amazing. Actually, it is 'time travel' that invigorates me and gives me time to pause and think about life, places, adventures, God, people, the husband and puppy that await me, etc. The time difference plays tricks with me and my brain bounced around from ideas and dreams, to worries and fears. All in all, international travel is fascinating and surreal - and I love it.

Fortunately for me, I return home to a country of friends, a city of neighbors and a home with a cute, but bigger, puppy. Phone calls and emails check in on my safe travels and international adventures. Lunches are planned with girlfriends (Lisa and Becky - see you next week) to catch up on all the little details that make up our lives. Life is good. Being home is great.

The real world also brought back a sad reality of a friend with a very ill infant. I had prayed for Daniel while in the Atlantic sky and return to learn that there are more severe diagnoses and potential challenges ahead. I wish there was 'time travel' for my girlfriend and her husband. I wish they could travel to a place where Daniel was well and they are able to laugh together as a family. I'd transport them to a place where they're happy not sad, rested and relaxed not stressed and where answers and solutions would reveal themselves. If only I really had the power of time travel.

But back in the 'real world' with a real time difference and still a bit of jet lag, I'm blessed to have friends, health, a sweet puppy, a warm house and a good life. Thanks friends for caring about me and my travels. Thanks girlfriends for the gift of your friendship and for all the happy memories of times together. And, if you're the 'praying kind,' please say a special prayer for Daniel and his parents. Pray that time will be a friend and that they will share great moments together.


P.S. One of my Christmas gifts from a very dear, thoughtful friend (and a wonderful gift buyer!) was from my friend Terri who gave me "Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. It was the perfect book to read while traveling and while pondering big life questions. For me, it was a very spiritual, uplifting book that made me look at people differently. Like on the Paris train with the gypsy accordion players, I noticed people's eyes and tried to see the beauty in every person. During my many sleepless nights I prayed for Daniel and my friends and to learn the lessons that I need. Thanks Terri! It was great to have something from you with me in Germany and France. It really made my trip much more meaningful and enjoyable!

Hello from Paris!

Hi Girlfriends! Bonjour from PARIS! (Not KY!) Can I just tell you that even in this wild country, all I really want is my girlfriends to hang out with?! Tonight I snuck away from my coworkers and just went to the Eiffel Tower on my own and it was wonderful! (Aside from wishing you all were there!) Funny how being in a distant place will make you miss those people who are closest to your heart. (Like you girlfriends!) Nothing like being in a foreign country to make you appreciate those who you feel closest to!

So, BONJOUR my Amis! (Hello by Friends! - Actually check out our new products on Cafepress for a French/Friend design!) Can I just tell you how much I miss my girlfriends?! Cath, Becky, Deana, Terri, Paula, Tina, Judy, Bridget, Anne, etc. - I miss you and wish you were here!

TIP TUESDAY #11 - Girlfriend Packing Tips

It's a little late for me, I leave tonight for Frankfurt, but we got some great comments to our travel tip request last Tuesday. So, let's stay on this little travel journey together. This week's TIP TUESDAY question is:

What packing tips do you have for traveling? Maybe it's traveling alone or with the family - what do you do to make it easier, tighter, better - with everything you need??

Again, a little late for me, I'm taking too much I'm sure to Frankfurt and Paris, plus I need to have some room for things we'll buy there. (We get to spend a day in Paris just 'trend shopping'!) I'm just concerned I have the right shoes and warm enough clothing without taking my HUGE coat!

I'll check in from the road but please share tips among yourselves!

P.S. Again, I'd highly recommend any travel books by Marybeth Bond. Listen to her podcast for great girlfriend or personal travel tips. Check out her web site for the "Gutsy Traveler" and her travel books for women!

Girlfriend updates, podcasts, teleseminar, travels ... busy week!

I love hearing from my girlfriends. Updates on their lives and their family, job, pets and social activities. I love knowing what they're up to and how they spend their time. I feel closer to them just knowing their schedules, their shopping finds, funny things their kids do/say. Even if, like today, it is a stressful update of a child in need of a miracle, I at least know what's going on and will keep her family in my thoughts and prayers. Any update from a girlfriend just helps me connect with them and I love that.

So, in an effort to reciprocate, here's the update from Girlfriendology Headquarters (aka: my very cold basement home office!):

1. The new podcast is posted with the December Contest Winners. Listen in for great stories on being thankful for Girlfriends - you'll be inspired. They share so openly and express their girlfriend appreciation. And congrats to the winners of the contest prizes! (But, aren't you all winners?!) Enter the January contest and take your girlfriend out for Starbucks on Girlfiendology!

2. I spoke this weekend with Dr. Karen Gail Lewis, a respected psychologist on relationships. She is amazing! She's written books (like her latest, With or Without Men: Single Women Taking Control of their Lives), conducts Unique Retreats for Women, etc. We'll interview her for the podcast on Valentine's Day but I wanted to make you aware of a special teleseminar (for single women) she's giving THIS WEEK! Check out her web site for all the details!

3. And finally, this time tomorrow evening I'll be on a plane for Frankfurt (then on Friday will take the train to Paris). As much as I'm thrilled to be going (I love travel and especially international travel - on an expense account!), I would much, MUCH rather be going with a girlfriend (or two, or three!). I'll try to check in via the blog from the road but will have to see if WIFI is easily accessible in Europe.

So, I won't be on the blog much in the coming week but I'd love if you'd still read, comment, share, forward, spread the word on Girlfriendology. It is a wonderful world - so much so because of the women who bless our lives. Thanks for making it a wonderful world for me!

And, because I just found it and it seems to fit my journeys and love of girlfriends, here is a quote from an old issue of O magazine on friendship:

"For happiness she required women to walk with. To walk in the city arm in arm with a woman friend (as her mother had with aunts and cousins so many years ago) was just plain essential. Oh! Those long walks and intimate talks, better than standing alone on the most admirable mountain or in the handsomest forest or hay-blown field (all of which were certainly splendid occupations for the wind-starved soul). More important even (though maybe less sweet because of age) than the old walks with boys she'd walked with as a girl ..." Grace Paley

Thanks girlfriends! Bonjour!

GNO, Girlfriend Get-togethers, Laughter and maybe some Wine!

When visiting Minneapolis recently I had dinner with my friends Amy and Kate and two of Amy's girlfriends. Over soups and wine to thaw our chilly bodies, were conversations, laughter, sharing and caring - the kind that warm your soul and remind me how special female friendship is to me. It was a fun, low-key evening where, I believe, everyone left feeling wrapped in 'girlfriendship.'

The current Girlfriendology Contest is about Girl's Night Out (GNO), Girlfriend Events (birthdays, showers, celebrations) or just Girlfriend Get-togethers. It doesn't have to be a formal event with invitations, special attire or limos. Getting together with girlfriends can be casual or dressy, festive or reflective, lots of friends together or just two girlfriends catching up on life. What matters is that time is spent together, that friendships are grown and we can be ourselves with women who love us for who we truly are.

What is your favorite GNO or girlfriends event? Was it a special birthday or dinner in the home of a girlfriend? Was it just coffee together or a much needed walk-talk? I'd love to share your ideas, stories, amusing tales - from recent events or even times growing up when you spent quality time with your best girlfriends and how those memories make you happy. Share - you'll inspire others. (And, join the contest and win Starbucks gift cards so you can take your girlfriend out for coffee on Girlfriendology!) Have fun girlfriends!

TIP TUESDAY #10 - Girlfriend Airport Travel Tips

Monday and Tuesday this week found me in Atlanta (and airports in between). Next Tuesday I head for Germany and France which means more airports and an even "longer time to hang in the sky." (Sorry, some old John Denver line!)
So, this week's TIP TUESDAY question is:

What tips do you have for airports and flying?

Don't get me wrong, I generally LOVE airports. The energy, the people watching, the movement of people on a mission going somewhere with a whole bunch of strangers, the interaction and conversations, the anticipation of 'time travel' to a different destination ... it is a luxury that I recognize and appreciate for the opportunity.

However, there are also the long security lines, even longer transports to terminals, super tight seats, waiting on the tarmack, delays, unexpected changes in plans ... the spectrum of life's ups and downs (literally) all in the space of a few hours between destinations.

My tip is to walk. I walked from Check-in at Delta in Atlanta through the underground tunnel and back and forth on Terminals A, B and C yesterday. It helped me occupy my time, gave me lots of people watching opportunities and helps me feel better for the snacks I consume (in lieu of a real meal!). I get energized from airports, inspired by the different people who's path I cross and sometimes even blessed by smiles and random acts of kindness along the way.

Share your airport travel tip. Selfishly, I can use it before next week's international flights. Hopefully others can share and benefit from tips so we help each other have safe and enjoyable journeys, or as my Dad called it 'traveling mercies.'

P.S. For great girlfriend or personal travel tips, check out the podcast with Marybeth Bond. She is the "Gutsy Traveler," and the #1 Women's Travel Expert. From places to visit to how to pack, shop, dress, etc. Marybeth's the expert. Check out her and her great travel books for women!

Spending time with Girlfriends - like Carrie, from The Diva Cast

At our girlfriend dinner on Wednesday night, my friend Judy stirred and stirred her mixed fruit. She had more pineapple than other fruits and she couldn't mix it enough to make it look, as she said, "interesting". That's kind of how it is with a girlfriend group. You need some diversity, some difference in opinion and age, women with different backgrounds and lifestyles. Combine these together and you definitely get interesting.

Stir up five fun, fabulous, forty-something females from Atlanta, GA and you get not only interesting, but you get life, laughter, love and all kinds of conversations. CARRIE RUNNALS, one of The Diva Cast, spoke with me yesterday for our weekly Girlfriendology Podcast.


The Diva Cast is a podcast with Carrie and her Diva girlfriends Sharon, Suzanne, Julie and Amy. They discuss real life issues like marital counseling and sex, and interview authors and experts on all types of interesting subjects. Listening in is like overhearing a really fun conversation at a nearby table in a restaurant - only this way you're allowed to laugh out loud and share it with your friends!

Carrie shares her passions with Girlfriendology - for her friends (Divas and others), her family and her love of writing and books. Recently she started Words-to-Mouth, a blog and complementary Internet talk show introducing readers to authors beyond the printed page. Even with her busy Diva life (being a mom, wife, writer, investor, Podcast Diva and now with Words-to-Mouth), Carrie graciously spent time with Girlfriendology talking about her girlfriends and living life with passion. Listen in - you'll love listening to Carrie!

So, like that fruit salad, mix up a bunch of your girlfriends together and see how interesting the conversation gets!

P.S. It was great to talk with Carrie because she has become a girlfriend of mine from finding Girlfriendology online and recommending Girlfriendology to friends, mentioning it in interviews, etc. (Thanks Carrie!) She demonstrates to me the beauty of female friendship - where we help each other. Just think how wonderful the world would be if we all supported each other with friendship, ideas, assistance! Go for it!

Girlfriend Get-togethers - time with friends

Is your schedule stretched to capacity? Overwhelmed with your To Do list? Exhausted just thinking about what all you have/need to do? Or am I the only one?

Right now I'm stressed. I want to spend time on Girlfriendology but I have multiple jobs right now - not including home responsibilities, taking care of the new pup, etc. I have to set boundaries on my time because it is just such a valuable, limited commodity at this point in my life.

This week was hectic at the job (and I haven't even taken down the holiday decorations yet!) but I knew spending Wednesday night with my girlfriends was a priority, no matter what. My girlfriend group was getting together at Paula's candle-lit home for a salad pitch-in dinner and to catch up on life. Ruth Sara was still in town which was perfect! Judy climbed up the street to make it. Joyce was new and Debbie was back after a hiatus. (Becky and Melody were sick - hope you're better soon! Tina is moving her dad this week. We missed you!)

Six women gathered around the table to share a meal and our lives. Connections were made (like Joyce and Debbie realizing they had a very personal connection at a funeral three years ago) and plans were set (future dinners together, running into each other on an upcoming trip, etc.). The food, a contribution 'salad bar,' was perfect for New Year's diets (even with all the treats Paula tempted us with!).

However the real nourishment was to our female spirits. We laughed, teared up, shared our frustrations, disappointments*, goals, secrets, joys. My stress floated away in the positive energy in that special home. It was a healing evening. A hopeful gathering. A female 'family' who do life together. And I don't know what I'd do without these caring, beautiful girlfriends.

Are you stressed? Dealing with life? Who better to 'do life' with than your girlfriends?! This month's Girlfriendology contest asks for your comments on Girl's Night Out events or just Girlfriend Gatherings. Please share. Your ideas and advice will inspire others. And think how much better life would be with less stress and more time with girlfriends!

* Caroline Cheshire of HealingBaskets.com shared great advice for caring for friends in her recent podcast with Girlfriendology. Listen in for advice on how to help your girlfriends deal with life and be the girlfriend to them you want to be.

Helping Girlfriends Heal - New Podcast with Caroline Cheshire

Unfortunately we all know women who are dealing with struggles - divorce, cancer/illness, taking care of aging parents, losing jobs or losing loved ones. I have several girlfriends going through 'stuff' right now - Dana and Allison are both on chemo and dealing with their treatment options, Lisa (aka: LL Cool J) just lost her aunt (and a friend of mine), Beth and her husband have separated ... just look around and there are people hurting and struggling.

As a girlfriend, how can we help? CAROLINE CHESHIRE not only lost her baby several years ago, but she also lost some friends who didn't know how to talk to her after her miscarriage. This, and seeing the difficulty that some people have in supporting their friends and family through trying times, inspired her to start HealingBaskets.com. Her passion for people and helping us help each other during situations like divorce, losing a job, being a care giver, etc. has lead to a web site with great gifts and gift giving recommendations for our friends and family in need. She shares insight into what to say and do (listen!) and even what to NOT say or do. Great girlfriend advice for times when we need a girlfriend to help us do the right thing.

I had the honor of speaking with Caroline (and her beautiful British accent!) for the Girlfriendology Podcast. I was impressed with her thoughtfulness and inspired by her genuine passion for helping us help others. She's a women whose business is about making it a better world, one relationship at a time. (Which is exactly the same goal as Girlfriendology!) Thanks Caroline for sharing and for making us better girlfriends through Healing Baskets! (Tell your girlfriends about www.healingbaskets.com!)

TIP TUESDAY #9 - What's your girlfriend tip for a healthy life?

Did you make a New Year's resolution to lose weight? Eat more healthy? Exercise more? (I did, as I sit here on the internet while the treadmill sits idle!)

So, this week's TIP TUESDAY questions are:

What do you do to stay in shape and healthy? What exercise or diet plan seems to work for you? (What can you stay with longer than the first few weeks of January?!)

For me, walking is the best exercise program I can maintain. I walk on Saturdays with some girlfriends. Pretty soon we'll train for the half marathon (to walk, not run!). I do enjoy my treadmill when I have good reading materials and have the time to spend on it. And, I need to write on a calendar what I do to hold myself accountable!

What do you do? Please leave a comment. Maybe you'll inspire other women to stay healthy and happy in 2008!

P.S. Interested in more info and a very interesting, informative interview? Recently Emotional Eating Coach Ellen Shuman talked with me on our Podcast about 'healthy at any size.' Listen in! Not only did we talk about being healthy but also the healthy relationships we can have with our girlfriends by not allowing negative body image influences.

Vote for favorite Girlfriend Story (from Dec. Girlfriendology Contest)

Sure the primaries are starting, but we'll have a whole year of election news. So, here's your opportunity to VOTE for the best Girlfriendology Contest Submission for December! The request was to write in your best girlfriend story. And, for the first time, YOU are invited to vote for the best story!

The top five prize winners will each receive a Starbucks gift card and, the top overall winner will also receive a Girlfriendology Journal. (In addition, in December we had the "Great Girlfriend Gift Giveaway" so 31 books/prizes were given away to 31 women who submitted stories!)

Drum roll please! Please vote on the COMMENTS button below or send an email to ideas@girlfriendology.com. Here are the top 10 entries:

(1) When we moved to our new house we didn’t know anyone in the city. Fortunately we found a house by a very nice woman who made me feel right at home. Janet would bring over food, invite me to dinners with her girlfriends, pick up our mail when we were on vacation, etc. It really made me love the neighborhood because I had such a great friend and neighbor.

(2) I moved a lot growing up and each time was more difficult as I got older and needed girlfriends nearby. When I had to move my senior year of high school to another state, my friend Rachel stayed in touch with me with phone calls and letters. She kept me up to date on all my other friends, what I was missing, what she was up to. I know it was a simple thing but it meant the world to me – that she valued my friendship and that she genuinely missed me. She was a good example of friendship to me.

(3) I am so thankful for my friends because they are so thoughtful. I have started Weight Watchers and they are so very supportive of me. They are always asking how things are going, how much weight I have lost, and just how I am looking. They make me feel good. One of my friends even makes her snacks now so I can still enjoy eating snacks with them when we have our "ladies night out". I think that is so considerate! Friends are always there for each other, and know when you need the extra love. We help each other through things.

(4) I worked in an ER with three other great nurses. We recently all took jobs in different hospitals but have managed to make a point to get together 1-2 times a month for dinner. As you can guess, our jobs are very stressful and we all have children and are married. We range in ages from 26-57. I'm thankful that I've found these wonderful girlfriends to share my life stories with. We agree that your job can suck the life out of you but girlfriends are there to breath the life back into you. We all feel re-energized after getting together for laughs, sometimes tears, hugs, and the promise that it won't be long before we see each other again!

(5) My best friend and I grew up together. From the time we were seven years old we lived two houses down from each other. I was nicked named her 'Shadow' because every where she went I went. We are both 39 years old and live on two different coast but we still talk once a month. It's like I still live two houses down from each other. We are still best of friends to this day!

(6) Right now I am so thankful for a girlfriend who has sent gifts, encouraging emails and cards after cards while I recover from an ankle fusion. It has been rough but only her and my sister have stuck with me through it all on a regular basis. Others only ask when they see me out. It means so much to hear from her weekly.
(7) I could not make it through the holidays without my sister, who has been such a friend, and the church secretary, who has listened over and over again to me. I am still recovering from surgery. All I wanted was to be able to make my divinity I make every year for my Mother for Christmas but did not think I would be able to stand and make it. Today I made two batches and was able to send my Mother, who will turn 79 on New Years Day, her divinity for Christmas. This means more than any gift I could get.

My Church Secretary has encouraged me over and over as I've struggled because I could not decorate for the holidays but I am managing to do some goodies. So I don't know what I would have done without these two and another Lady friend of mine who emails and keeps in constant touch.

A person recovering from a surgery and dealing with wheelchairs, walkers, crutches and constant changes needs girlfriends. I also faced a scare of breast cancer in the midst of all this. So I praise God for these three friends.

(8) I am thankful for my girlfriend Sherry because we are identical twins and are so much alike that I can talk to her about anything and she understands. We have been best friends since the womb so we have a bond that can never be broken.

I am also thankful for other dear friends like my friend Sue who I have been friends with since High School. Even though we live far apart we still keep in touch and are there for each other during the bad times as well as the good. Girlfriends truly are a gift that should be treasured. One that is priceless.

(9) I am SO thankful for girlfriends! Without them I wouldn't have the job I do today! My friend Chris and I LOVE to craft. During law school we joked and joked that we would love to create something called Arts and Crafts Law so we could somehow practice law and craft at the same time. Well, law school passed and she went back to work for the government and I went to work for the government and corporations. She NEVER forgot our conversation.

As time passed, I began to meet clients that had a need for my services. So many wonderful and talented artists began to encourage me. I lost my job with my big firm and was devastated. When I called my friend she said "Remember that conversation we had in law school? What is stopping you from finally practicing Arts and Crafts Law? You have created it you know."

Her encouragement (along with my other girlfriends) allowed me to pursue my dream. I am so thankful because girlfriends listen AND REMEMBER!

(10) I love my girlfriends. Each one is totally unique, and yet we're often so much the same. We all have our strong and weak points, and as girlfriends, we encourage and tolerate those points accordingly. Some remember your birthday, and some still love you even if they forget, but no matter what happens we ending up staying girlfriends.

Why do I love my girlfriends? It's simple. It's Girlfriendtelepathy. The ability to communicate and exchange critical messages non-verbally. It's the raised eyebrow and half-smirk that you exchange with her when a cute guy walks in. A wrinkled nose and an eye roll when he says something cheesy.

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So, who do you think has the best girlfriend story? VOTE!!!

Girlfriend Entrepreneurs Club - should you start one?

Tina is a interior/pillow designer. Judy is a techie and writer (with a talent for poems and being funny). Joyce is creating a shop for heirloom gifts for children. Paula and her daughters started a catering business. Helen (who joined us for the first time today) is working on a book and a new source of income. (Becky, "the Kitchen Goddess", and Melody, the Tupperware Manager Maven couldn't join us - but we missed you!) And, you know me, I'm dedicated to building Girlfriendology - a place for 'inspiration, appreciation and celebration of girlfriends.'

We're a diverse group - some are neighbors who've known each other for years, some are new friends and new entrepreneurs. We meet monthly to help each other grow our businesses and see our dreams become reality. And, to assist each other with challenges we struggle with, but also very much to celebrate our successes together.

WE ("Women Entrepreneurs," what WE call ourselves) met today to not only explore our dreams and businesses, but to discuss how our group can best benefits each of us. One part of our discussion this morning was men - should we allow them in the 'club?' It was a tough decision because we don't want to exclude other entrepreneurs who need a group to help them with their businesses. To be honest, I crave the unique strength, energy and support that I receive from women entrepreneurs - things that I very much benefit from and value. Nothing against men, but men and women communicate differently and, to me, it just seems to work best in an environment where WE 'speak the same language.'

Are you an entrepreneur or someone with a dream? Perhaps you should start a girlfriend club to help and hold each other accountable toward reaching your dreams. I'd highly recommend it as much for ideas and support as for the camaraderie and community. Not an entrepreneur? Start a Mommies group or book club, a group of girlfriends to go to dinner or bowling every month (or monthly GNO - 'girls night out'), a knitting night group or scrapbook 'sistas, take classes or experiment on gourmet recipes together. Just do life together. And who better with than your girlfriends?!

TIP TUESDAY #8 - 2008 Girlfriend "Goals"

Happy 2008 Girlfriends! I hope the holidays were happy and that you enjoyed great times with your family and friends. The festivities and social plans may be over - so hopefully there is time for us all to look ahead to a great '08.

From being an entrepreneur for several years, I recognize the benefits, and need the structure, from goal setting. It helps me focus on the important 'stuff and make sure I commit my time and efforts to what I really want to happen. As I alluded to in the previous post, I also think this is good when it comes to friendship. Not that it is a forced mandate or a cold, clinical approach to what should be a warm, personal relationship. But, it does help to have goals for your time - be it professionally, personally (family and friends), physically (health-wise), etc.

So, this week's TIP TUESDAY question is:

What are your girlfriend goals for 2008? Is there a particular girlfriend you need to focus on to help her or be more of a friend? Do you need to make time for your girlfriends or to meet new friends?

In addition to setting goals as a good way of making changes in our lives, I know that it makes me more accountable if I share them with someone. (That's why I have a couple girlfriend mastermind groups who challenge and encourage each other to reach our goals.) Having a very full schedule and not a lot of cash, I know a realistic goal for me has to be simple, yet heartfelt. I commit to sending Thank You notes to my girlfriends in 2008. I want to be a better friend by acknowledging how much my girlfriends contribute to my life and make sure that I tell them how special they are to me.

What are your goals? Please share and check back in with updates. Girlfriendology is about inspiration, appreciation and celebration of girlfriends. Consider goals of inspiring others, showing your appreciation or going out of your way to celebrate your friendships. 2008 will be great - with your girlfriends by your side!