Humbled, honored, blessed and loved by my Girlfriends

Last September, I bought a new Honda CRV. As soon as I started driving it, I noticed a few others in the neighborhood. Within a week, I saw silver Hondas all over town. It seemed like EVERYONE was driving a silver Honda CRV. I didn't notice it before, but now that I was looking for them, they were (and are) everywhere!

Now that I'm focusing on girlfriends and the benefits, joys and blessings of female friendship, I see examples of great girlfriends everywhere. My friend Penny who came over this morning to watch the women's World Cup Soccer. She shaved her head in solidarity with a friend going through chemo. She is my cheerleader and sister. My lawyer Tammy who sent me such a thoughtful gift recently. Ellen, my former neighbor, who even with a busy life and young sons, makes time to be with me. I could go on and on and on. (Laurie, Dana, Beth Anne, Lisa, Angie, Tina, Jill, Becky ... just a few of the women who have blessed my life this week.)

What I'm learning on this journey of "inspiration, appreciation and celebration of girlfriends," is that we really do need our girlfriends. I learn important lessons from them on a daily basis. And, I'm humbled by the kindness and thoughtfulness of my girlfriends.

To be honest with you, this focus on girlfriends often makes me feel like I'm not a very good one. (But I strive to be!) I should be more generous with my time and resources. I should always find the perfect gift and be there whenever my girlfriends need me. I wish I could anticipate my friends' needs, know when they need closeness or time alone, be able to read their minds and help them through life's bumps and foggy times.

Just because I started Girlfriendology and I 'preach' the wonderful benefits and blessings of girlfriends, it doesn't mean that I have it all together or that I'm the prime example of a perfect friend. But it does mean that I'm learning, I'm growing, I'm striving to be better and that's exactly what my goal is for Girlfriendology. Together we can make the world better, one friendship at a time. We can show our children and men how to care about and love each other. Our female friendships can span continents, cross racial lines, improve our quality (and quantity) of life and turn strangers into sisters.

I don't see as many silver Hondas as I did when my car was new. I don't really look for them and I'm okay with that. I don't ever want to overlook girlfriends - mine and other women's relationships with their female friends. I want to stay focused, to grow by learning about these loyal, loving people who just make life better. And, I want to always inspire, appreciate and celebrate the true blessings of girlfriends.

Thanks Penny, Tammy, Laurie and all my girlfriends. Thanks to you for reading this and caring about your girlfriends. I'd take any of you over a Honda any day!

Girlfriend Contest - Tell your Favorite Girlfriend Story!

Do you have a great story to share on a special girlfriend? Which girlfriend helped you, hugged you or made you laugh - just when you needed it? Who was there for you when you really needed them?

I know from friendships with amazing girlfriends that we need each other. Now I need something from you! Girlfriend Stories. And to thank and encourage you, we're even giving prizes!

Our first contest:

When has a girlfriend gone out of her way to make you feel special and loved? What's your favorite girlfriend story?

PRIZES: The top five entries will each receive $10 Starbucks cards - so you can take your girlfriend out for coffee on Girlfriendology. The top story will also receive a Girlfriendology journal.

Please share and check back for the great stories and ideas offered by girlfriends around the globe.

Visit Girlfriendology.com for complete rules and information. Deadline is October 31, 2007 midnight EST. Send entries to contest@girlfriendology.com. Make sure you include your contact info. Thanks Girlfriend!

(Since I'm waiting on the web guy to get the rules up, know that submitting a story gives us your permission to print it on our blog/web site/communications, etc. We'll never pass along your full name or your email addresses - ever.)

A thoughtful, perfect present from a thoughtful, perfect Girlfriend

As I've blogged, the past three weeks have been so tough for us. We lost our sweet golden retriever Stella after a very quick illness. My girlfriends have shown their love and support through calls, emails, cards and gifts - and to each one, I am reminded how incredibly blessed I am with the best female friends. (And, I hope you feel the same way about your girlfriends!)

One friend, a fellow dog and cat lover, thoughtfully chose the perfect gift for us. This small angel statue with wire wings is carrying a (again perfectly!) golden puppy. Tears fell as soon as I opened the package and I knew that my friend Tammy had found the perfect gift just for me. And, I also knew that I would never look at that statue without thinking with love of her and our furry 'daughter' whom we so deeply miss.

There is something so special about a girlfriend who makes the time and effort to give perfect gifts. With Tammy, this gift shows how valued our friendship is, especially since she is a busy lawyer and she's never met Stella. This meaningful present will remind me each day of the girlfriend I strive to be - thoughtful and caring.

Thanks Tammy for your beautiful gift. Thanks for caring about me and for sharing in my pain - it does help. And thanks to all my other girlfriends who understood what we were, are and will go through. I strive to be a better girlfriend, because female friendship is so important. Not only to me, but through it I become a better friend and person to my female friends as well as my husband, guy friends, family and all others. Thanks Tammy for the blessing of your friendship. Thanks for being thoughtful and perfect. And, most of all, thank you for the valuable lesson I will remember from your example of a wonderful girlfriend.

p.s. GirlfriendologyToo is a blog for creative girlfriends. It shares lots of ideas and inspiration for girlfriend gifts and greetings you can make. Please visit it and share your ideas. That's how we learn and grow - from sharing between Girlfriends!

Girlfriends - We're a trend and a lifestyle! (No wonder we're so fun!)

Be on the look out! Girlfriend-themed products continue to be the BIG trend as reported by trade publication, Greetings Etc. in the Sept/Oct issue I just received. As they say (very much like the theme to Girlfriendology!), "Women have always known about it - that strong bond and sense of support they share with each other." There just is a special relationship between female friends and women are looking to events, products, cards, trips and all kinds of ways to celebrate this!

That's why you're here, right? Your girlfriends mean the world to you and you don't know what you'd do without them. Why not look for some girlfriend-themed products as a way of expressing your appreciation and showing them how special they are to you? Check out our Girlfriendology mugs, journals and wearables as well as our books, videos and other gifts. Visit GirlfriendologyToo if you'd like ideas on making gifts and greetings for your girlfriends. Or just write an email, make a call or hug a friend. Then come back here and share. Your comments may inspire another woman to show her girlfriend the appreciation she deserves.

Happy National Women's Friendship Day!

Holidays are meant to remind us of things ... of Veteran's who have fought and died for our freedom, for our Nation's Independence, of being thankful for what we have. Today is one of those day. Not Thanksgiving, but a very similar sentiment. Today we pay homage to the wonderful gift of women's friendships.

National Women's Friendship Day was started in 1999 by Kappa Delta Sorority as a way of stopping our busy lives to celebrate our female friendships. (Thanks Kappa Delta!)

My NWFD celebration is later tonight. Current and past members of my girlfriend's group are getting together for dinner. Some will meet for the first time, others will catch up on events since we last were together. All of us will laugh, possibly cry, eat, share and forge friendships that may last for the rest of our lives.

I'm honored to be in this group. Each person has taught me so much and shown me love and understanding, as well as being supportive of my Girlfriendology dreams and my personal life (like missing our sweet dog Stella). So to each of you, I say THANKS.

Thanks JILL for inviting me to the group. For being a friend, for making me smile and for your passion to make life better for your friends and city.

Thanks PAULA M for inviting us into your home. Your generous hospitality is so appreciated and we love feeling at home in your home. (Heck, Melody's planning to move in!)

Thanks BECKY for so often feeding us and for your group leadership. Your passion for your girlfriends (and your pups!) is a wonderful example for all of us.

Thanks MELODY for reminding us why we make time for each other - that girlfriends are worth it. I am impressed with your sincere love for us and always amused by your great sense of humor!

Thanks RUTH SARA for staying with the group even through moves, travel and changes in your life. You're such a blessing to me and the group.

Thanks LYNN for making me feel part of the group right away. Thanks too for your compassion and understanding over Stella. (I'm glad you and Eddy found each other!)

Thanks PAULA G for joining us this year and for your friendship. I'm blessed and impressed with your passion for South Africa and for your family and friends.

Thanks DEBBIE for being so dedicated to your passion (running) and for helping others. I'll always remember your 50 mile run on your 50th b'day - you inspire me!

Thanks JUDY for joining the group. I also appreciate that you've participated in our girlfriends entrepreneurial group. Thanks for your ideas, support and for sharing life with us.

Thanks TINA for your faith and wonderful perspective. I learn so much from you - from relationships to entrepreneurial solutions. You have blessed my life.

Now your turn - go tell your girlfriends why you love and appreciate them! Happy National Women's Friendship Day! Hugs, me

Girlfriends, Sisters, Mothers ... Women who bless our lives

My friend Laurie just sent me the following "chain email." I usually don't read, much less resend, those but this one is about girlfriends and all the wonderful women in our lives who bless, love, accept, inspire and encourage us.

Instead of passing this along in a mass email, I'll share it with you. As you read it, think about the special women in your life and how much they mean to you. Tomorrow is National Women's Friendship Day. Call up your girlfriends, or visit, have dinner together, send an eCard or greeting card, etc. Take time out for the special women who bless your life with their friendship and love. (Thanks Laurie!)

Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.

Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.

Men don't do what they're supposed to do.

Hearts break
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.

Careers end.
BUT........
Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how
many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never farther away
than needing her can reach.

When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you
have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life
will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on,
praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on
your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the
valley's end.

Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk
beside you...Or come in and carry you out.

Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters,
daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers,
Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins and extended
family, all bless our life!

The world wouldn't be the same without women, and
neither would I. When we began this adventure called
womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or
sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we
would need each other.

Every day, we need each other still. Pass this on
to all the women who help make your life meaningful.

I just did.

Girlfriends who are Masterminds ... and wonderful at giving advice!

Several years ago, my girlfriends Katie and Lisa and I formed a mastermind group*. Each month we had a conference call where we shared an update on our businesses, requested and offered advice and set goals for the following month. Quarterly we'd try to get together at a trade show or for an overnight planning session for intense focus on our goals and dreams. (That photo is Katie and Lisa at one of our quarterly overnights!)

So often, as entrepreneurs, you don't have a sounding board or staff to celebrate with, ask for ideas, etc. Mastermind groups are a GREAT way to have a 'team' of people you respect helping you accomplish your goals. I highly recommend it. You don't have to live near each other, be in the same industry/business or be experts at everything! You do have to trust each person, look out for opportunities and ideas for each other and make a commitment to take the session and goals seriously. (If your mastermind team is taking time to discuss an idea for you, you probably want to at least explore it so they didn't waste their time - you know?)

After some changes in our lives, we agreed a year or so ago that we'd end the mastermind group. Change happens and none of us took it personally, or found replacement mastermind teams.

Things do change and fortunately for us, we're back at it! We had our third mastermind meeting this week and it was great. We caught up on goals, celebrated successes, shared ideas and planned our upcoming month. It really helps to have a plan and your mastermind team is so helpful in defining it.

Thanks Katie and Lisa for your ideas, advice, care and friendship. I'm so blessed to know you and to be back in touch again! And I know Girlfriendology will benefit from your wise and creative ideas!

* Here's a great article by Jane Pollak on Mastermind groups! She coaches creative women. Check out her web site for more info too!

More ideas for National Women's Friendship Day (Your Girlfriends are worth it - right?!)

Right!!

First - a Weekend Update
I've said it before, and I'll say it again - I'm blessed with great girlfriends! This past weekend I met with my girlfriend's entrepreneurial group where we shared our business updates and dreams. (Thanks Judy & Tina! We missed you Melody, Paula, Joyce and Becky!) Then I spent time with Cath, celebrating her birthday and just catching up. On the way home I stopped at Dana's house for wine and conversation. Chatted with LL Cool J (aka: Lisa), Beth Anne and Jill this week about work 'stuff. Lots of fun girlfriends with whom to share life!

My original plan was to host a brunch for my girlfriends next Sunday in honor of National Women's Friendship Day. Due to losing our sweet dog, which kind of put me in a fog for a couple weeks, I had to go to plan B. After running into several women who are/were in my girlfriend group, I orchestrated a dinner for Sunday night with them. We'll catch up, laugh, possibly cry and just be the kind of friends who love to spend time together.

Here are other ideas for National Women's Friendship Day, just in case you're interested:

* Visit a nursing home and talk with women about their girlfriends growing up. I'm sure they'd love to share and have great stories!
* Bake some cookies and deliver them to your girlfriends. Add a note and the recipe. They'll love it!
* Curl up with a good book on girlfriends.
* Make a Girlfriend Gratitude Journal (or use a normal journal). Make a habit of each day acknowledging the role your girlfriends play in your life.
* Hang out with a bunch of young girls and tell them your stories. Make sure they hear the message that having female friends is one of the great things in life.

Then, let Girlfriendology know what you did to celebrate! Thanks Girlfriends!!!

National Women's Friendship Day - Sunday, September 16th

Make plans now for the National Women's Friendship Day - September 16th (Next Sunday!). Started in 1999 by Kappa Delta Sorority to celebrate the great bond of girlfriends, what are YOU going to do to celebrate?! A few ideas:

- Plan a spa day or brunch with girlfriends
- Send cards to all your girlfriends telling them how special their friendship is to you
- Start a book club with girlfriends so you can get together on a regular basis (Visit the Girlfriendology Gift Shop for book and gift ideas!)
- Free calls on weekends? Spend the day calling your long distance and local gal pals
- Buy a bunch of mums, make some cards and then deliver them to your girlfriends
- Send a Women's Friendship Day eCard from Kappa Delta

What ideas do YOU have?! Send your thoughts and plans to ideas@girlfriendology.com. Celebrate Girlfriends!

For a good laugh (and update on GirlfriendologyToo)

Some girlfriends are shoppers, some are chefs, some girlfriends love to read while others prefer yoga or running, and some girlfriends are 'crafty' and some aren't. For those girlfriends who are crafty, and especially those wonderful creative women who love to make gifts and/or greeting cards for their girlfriends, I started another blog - GirlfriendologyToo. It focuses on 'the creative side of girlfriends.' Check it out for ideas on things you can make for and/or with girlfriends. And feel free to post comments, questions and ideas. I'd love to hear from creative women! (And everyone is creative!)

Actually, that is why I started Girlfriendology - to share inspiration, generate appreciation and encourage celebration of girlfriends. Sharing ideas with each other is one of the wonderful benefits of having female friends. Together we can solve problems, create new ideas and basically make life a lot more fun.


Speaking of creative girlfriends AND making live fun ... for a good laugh, I just found out one of the Carol Duvall Shows that I taped (for HGTV and DIY Network) is online. I really don't care for watching myself on TV but hopefully you'll enjoy! Check out these image transfer projects on Carol Duvall - part 1 & part 2 as well as my book, The New Book of Image Transfer. (Doesn't my hair look funny?! And is "mender" really a word?!)

Back to all the different 'varieties' of girlfriends and their unique qualities/personalities. Isn't the world of girlfriends great?! Show your appreciation by sending a note to your girlfriends and telling them how special each one of them is to you. It is almost National Women's Friendship Day (Sept. 16th). Celebrate it everyday of the year! Thanks girlfriends!!

More Girlfriends - More Thanks! More Blessings!

This has been a tough week. Our great golden, Stella, had to be put to sleep a week ago today and nothing seems the same as when she was such a part of our life. Our sleeping and eating, laughter and tears, coming and going are all different now.

The one stabilizing constant is our friends. Girlfriends, neighbors, coworkers, family ... so many have sent cards, wrote emails, left flowers, mailed gifts, etc. It has been so comforting to know that they care about us and understand the grief of losing a beloved family pet.

Specifically I'd like to thank just a few of our friends for their thoughtfulness:

* Bridget - our former neighbor who recently had family sadness to deal with, still made the effort to write a beautiful note and leave us some chocolate and wine (which, in keeping with her/my/Stella's hair color was a "Redhead Red")

* Liz & Jeff, Nikki & Todd, Shelley & Dave - neighbors who have dogs and understand our sadness, left flowers and cards

* Ellen & Doug - former neighbors and wonderful friends who we called with the news because they loved Stella too. They sent a very thoughtful and yummy gift from their cabin in northern Michigan.

* Anne, Penny, Becky, Dana & Bear - who spent time with us comforting and serving as a much needed distraction and respite

Too many to name them all but each of them special and loved. We still are sad but with friends like these, we know we are blessed beyond measure. Thanks for being a friend. Thanks for caring, thoughtfulness and your kindness.

Pet your animals. Rescue/adopt a stray. Call a friend. Write a note. Give a hug. Count your blessings. Thanks friends!

A time to cry, a time to heal ... a time to be with Girlfriends

Hello from a mountain house in northern NC, near Asheville. Friends Allison & Lee invited us and another couple, Colleen and Steve, to spend this holiday weekend with them. Allison, Colleen and I met years ago when we walked a marathon together and now walk together almost every Saturday morning. They are girlfriends who I love 'doing life' with on our weekly catch up of health issues (read more), life, work, friends, etc.

This week, after losing our beloved Stella, it is medicinal to spend time away from life with girlfriends and their husbands. They are all dog owners/lovers so they understand the grief we're feeling. And, with Allison's two dogs here (one a golden retriever, like Stella), we're getting some much needed fur therapy.

Yes, there are still tears and sad memories but with people nearby who understand, we realize how blessed we are to have friends. And, with all of us dealing with different life challenges, we value creating new, happy memories together.

Thanks to Allison and Lee for their generous hospitality (and for letting me love on their dogs). And thanks to Colleen and Steve for driving us and for their support and understanding as we miss our sweet pup. With friends like these, and fun times shared together, we realize that this is a time to grieve but also to heal, to remember old times and celebrate new memories, to cry and, very much, to laugh.

Pet your furry friends. Take time away from work and life to spend with friends. Get away from 'stuff' and celebrate the wonderful blessing of friends.

Eulogy for a Perfect Dog - Thanks Stella (and thanks girlfriends for caring for me)

"Dave's Girl Stella" AKA: Stella-BoBella, Wigglebutt, Silly Girl

It is with immeasurable sadness that I say good-bye to the best furry friend a girl could have. Our almost 12-year old Golden Retriever, Stella, passed away this week from a way-too-fast battle with cancer. Friday afternoon she was fine, that night she had trouble walking and it just went downhill.

I know the loss of a pet can't compare with losing a child, husband or close 'human' but who couldn't fall deeply in love with a face as sweet as hers? My sadness runs deep and my tears won't end. She was our constant companion, best buddy, cheap entertainment, reason to exercise and favorite comedian. She was a friend I'll never recover from losing.

Thanks first to Stella. She gave us years of love, laughter and joy. You'll be missed on an on-going basis forever.

Thanks too to my girlfriends. So many of my female friends have shown me great acts of sympathy and compassion. Dog-lovers/owners or not, they feel my pain and for that I am so grateful. Thanks to Deana for the gorgeous plant which will always remind me of Stella and also of your kind friendship. To Becky, who came right over to hug me, I love that you have a heart for dogs as well (and that you foster so many!). Thanks to Terri, Beth Anne, LL Cool J, Tina, Ruth Sara, Melody, Barb and so many other fabulous female friends who sent words of love and support. Thanks to Anne and Penny for trying to distract us with conversation and food/beverages. We need that - thanks!

I miss Stella. I really, really do. She was an amazing dog. But I'm also blessed with loving, caring girlfriends who are also amazing and are helping me through this sad time. Thanks to you all. I feel your hugs from all over, and it helps. Thanks, Debba

Furballs, Hugs and Girlfriend Gratitude

Stella, our beloved 12-year old golden retriever, is very sick. It happened quickly and we're unsure of what the coming week will bring. We had to take her to the emergency vet yesterday and we've even slept on the living room floor since she's unable to go up stairs and we want to be near her. It breaks my heart to see her suffer and I'm just torn up by even the thought of losing her.

To some people, this may be silly. Dogs are just animals. Pets are just vehicles for furballs and the signature of a messy house. But to my girlfriends, who love me and therefore love what I love, they feel my pain. Ellen, Amy and Colleen offered their sympathy and positive thoughts last night at dinner. I ran into Barb and Ruth Sara this morning when I was crying. Their hugs and concern were genuine and so appreciated. Ruth Sara called Becky who then called to check in on me and Stella. Jill wants an update tomorrow on what our Vet says. I called another Barb (my college roommate) who consoled me. I emailed other college girlfriends, Laurie, Rhonda and Deana, knowing that they care and heard back that they do. Terri returned my email with her thoughts and concern for me and for Stella. (Stella is pretty loved by all who've met her - which also means everyone on whom she has shed!)*

Friendship is just like that. You love your friends so much, that what is important to them is also important to you. Female friends are the best because they genuinely care about the little and big things in life. Sure, she is 'just a dog,' but my girlfriends know that Stella is really part of our family. That isn't silly to them.

Thanks to my girlfriends for caring about me - and Stella. And, for all those times you've supported your friends through their little and big issues, thank YOU. Girlfriends are no accident. We're all here to help each other through the little, big and furry stuff. Thanks for caring.

* P.S. As I write this, I am overwhelmed with the blessing of so many girlfriends and so much love and care I have received just in the past 24-hours. If you ever feel lonely or just want to feel more blessed, take note of the support your friends offer by writing in a Girlfriend Gratitude journal. I do this each morning and it blesses my entire day thinking back over how wonderful my female friends are to me. Just write down all the great women in your life and how they bless you in a blank pad of paper or journal, or on a calendar. Soon you'll have wonderful reminders of the fabulous female friendships you're blessed with!

Celebrating Great Neighbors (and Girlfriends!) with Ice Cream!!

I've bragged before ... I have great neighbor girlfriends. Our no-stress book club (reading is optional, laughter is mandatory!), summer happy hours and fun female friendships make living on our street very special. Moms walk their kids around the block, families and dogs stroll by and kids learning to throw a football make every summer night entertaining.

Recently I entered Edy's HomeChurned Ice Cream contest for great neighborhoods. I wish I remember what I wrote on the online form, but I know it included some of the wonderful qualities of our neighborhood that I mentioned above. Of course, I'm writing this because we won! Tomorrow night we've invited all 50+ houses on our street along with former neighbors and others in the neighborhood for a big ice cream celebration. It should be a scream!

In true form, the girlfriends on the block have chipped in. Shelley invited the newspaper and they're sending a photographer. (I'll post a photo!) Anne, who isn't even in town, has volunteered her backyard and cornhole game. Stephanie graciously offered her yard since there is more room for kids to play. Another Ann (we have several Ann's on our street) stored the 12 containers of ice cream in her freezer this week. Genna, Judy, Pam and Diane have offered to help scoop. Everyone is chipping in and I know it will be a fun evening.

Why is our street so special? We've made an effort to know our neighbors. With even another Ann, I started the monthly book club. Several mom's take turns watching each others' children. We share flour, help each other when tree limbs go down and hang out on the sidewalk talking while the kids play.

How can you connect with your neighbors? Do you have girlfriends nearby? Go meet your neighbors. I bet you'll have more in common with them than you realize. Spend time together and develop female friendships. Stay in touch and, next year, apply for an Ice Cream contest! Happy end of summer!!

Sisters, neighbors, coworkers, moms, yoga/running friends ... all kinds of Girlfriends

Here's the girlie-girl way of looking at it ... You have pumps, tennis/walking shoes, platforms, boots, sandals, flip flops, Crocks(tm!), etc. in your closet, right? Guys may look at is as just a room full of shoes and think that they are silly and unnecessary. Women see it as the basics of getting dressed and feeling good about your personal style.

In the girlfriend world, there are close friends you've known since school or new neighbors on the street. Women you work with to friends of friends you've met and run into at the grocery store. Coworkers who become friends outside of work and women you see at yoga or book club. Look around and you'll most likely see a variety of girlfriends at different stages of friendship, with unique qualities and a variety of things in common. It's a wonderful world of girlfriends! Kinda like having a selection of shoes - you have lots of options for women with whom to share your life.

Still in Minnesota visiting friends, I had dinner with my girlfriend Amy last night. Amy is dating, I'm married. Amy has a corporate job, I'm entrepreneurial. Amy lives in the cold north(!), I live in the mid-west. She's a world traveler, I dream of being (and have had some very fun international adventures with her!). But get us together and we have so much in common and so much fun.

What type 'shoe' is her friendship??? Last night after dinner I thought about that. Our conversation ranged from her recent dating adventures to my entrepreneurial dreams. From common friends to philosophies on perspectives of life. I very much respect her opinion, welcome her advice and appreciate her friendship.

Our interaction reflected what I feel is so important about girlfriends and why I started Girlfriendology. I think if we girlfriends 'put our heads together' and help each other through life, that we all learn and benefit from each other. After talking with Amy, I felt stronger for having her support and friendship. Not that we focused on any negative issues but life can be stressful. Together I felt we each contributed problem-solving ideas or creative solutions to hopefully benefit each of us in reaching our dreams. And, thinking like shoes, (and I hope she sees this as a compliment!) to me our interaction was kind of like workboots. Very functional and productive, the "git-r done" type interaction that I love and benefit so much from.

Have a problem? Talk to a girlfriend. Want to do something fun? Call up a girlfriend. Need to laugh or share a great story? Go see a girlfriend. Stressed over life? Have dinner with a girlfriend. Together we make a great pair (or lots of pairs, like that shoe analogy!). After all, aren't girlfriends the perfect accessory?! Thanks Amy for being such a great girlfriend and for sharing life (and solutions/ideas!) with me! Big hugs!!!


p.s. If you're into the above shoes, you might be a "Desperate Housewives" fan. They're on Seenon.com.

The girlfriends in your life and the special blessings they bring

Greetings from Minneapolis where I used to live. It has been eight years since I moved, but still my girlfriends go out of their way to maintain the friendships. (And I feel so blessed!)

This morning we had brunch with our friends Terri and Bill who also invited Lisa and Todd to join us for a fabulous meal. Terri didn't look at this event selfishly, as a time for us to just be together. She, always being thoughtful and so kind, invited others to share in the special event of friends being together.

I so much love that about Terri. She is one of the most thoughtful girlfriends I know. She always thinks of the most personalized acts and gifts. She goes out of her way to bring friends together and to make girlfriends feel special. Terri always gives thoughtful gifts, adds something to a menu that is special just for me/us or takes time to create a special event just to make others feel loved and appreciated. She inspires me to be a better friend.

Each girlfriend in my life offers different blessings. Amy and Kate (sisters and very dear friends) had us over for dinner tonight with a dozen of our friends (including great girlfriends Cara, Chandra, Sue, Barb, Kathy and Patty) which made it a memorable and wonderful evening. Cath sent me a hilarious story on herself today which cracked me up. Christy invited me into her home this afternoon in the midst of carpet shampoo'ing (and child 'potty' issues!) to spend time just catching up on life.

As I time looking at my girlfriends and what I learn from them, I recognize that I am nothing without them. To Barb, my creative, spiritual, loving 'sister' to Amy, my forever friend and inspiration, I am blessed with amazing girlfriends.

What can you learn from your girlfriends? In what ways do they bless you? What amazing women do you have in your life that you need to appreciate and celebrate?! Do it! Plan events with your girlfriends. Send notes to say Thank You. Call them just to check in on their lives. Show them that you love and appreciate them. Girlfriends are a blessing and, if you have a great group of girlfriends, you're truly blessed!

How a Girlfriend's Laughter can lead to Tears.

Friday was a tough day for me. All my girlfriends have either left the company I work at or were out of town. Not to complain, but I just wanted to have lunch with a girlfriend. I needed some laughter and great conversation to cut the day in half.

My friend Holly and I always had the best lunches. No matter how your day was or how you felt, her laughter would light up the entire room and pull you into such a blessed place that you consciously were happy just being near her. After we both moved away from Minnesota, we rarely had the opportunity to have lunch together. Now that she's gone, I won't have that cherished, wonderful opportunity every again.

First, I need to tell you a little about my friend Holly. She loved her family and friends with an overflowing passion. She constantly inspired me and made me feel better about myself. Her friendship was treasured by all who knew her. Unfortunately, she succumbed to cancer last Thanksgiving. In my grief, I was just so honored to be able to be in MN to attend her memorial at her favorite art center (where she and I had taken pottery together).

At the memorial, amidst her works of art (like this shirt that she created with batik - that hangs inside my closet door so I see it, and think of her, everyday), her husband and sons shared the story of her life and professed their love and admiration for her. It was the most heart-breaking ceremony I've ever attended. I wasn't up to sharing - but I wanted to. I wanted to tell funny Holly stories and listen to others' tales of her infectious humor and joy.

After the memorial I emailed her husband. I told him about some of the amusing stories and events that I shared with Holly. I also included a story that Holly told me about buying a very expensive, ornate armoire - without telling David, her husband. Knowing that he might be a bit concerned over her purchase, she resorted to something perfectly Holly! She purchased an expensive silk tie for him. When he came home from work, she greeted him in front of the new furniture with nothing on except the tie and just said, "So ... how do you like the armoire?"

I emailed him that I didn't know if it was a true story or not but I loved that story because it was so Holly. He wrote me back with just a quick answer - "It was a very nice tie!"

Friday, several months after she left us all, I just wanted to have lunch with her. To ask her advice, be part of her laughter, have her smile at me one more time. But, in all my sadness (and I can't even imagine what her family feels), I am so humbled to have had her as my girlfriend.

In my tears, I celebrated a blessed girlfriend. Don't delay in spending time with a girlfriend. Call her for lunch. Take her to dinner. Send her a card or give her a call. Then say a word of thanks for the gift of her friendship. Thanks Holly. I love you and am so blessed to have been your friend.

Having great Girlfriends is as stylish as ... Heather Locklear?

On Wednesday evening at our weekly girlfriend group meeting, I announced that I needed a haircut but had no idea what to do. As someone who had long hair (that I cut myself) almost my entire life, I'm not well versed in how to find a good haircut much less how to direct a hair stylist. In fact, I've only paid for my hair to be cut about five or six times - in my life! I'm a novice and I severely needed girlfriend advice. And, knowing that I was planning to go back to the salon school where students cut hair, I wanted to give great direction in order to get a good cut.

Thankfully my girlfriends came to the rescue! Becky thought layers would help my hair curl. Tina even sent me this Heather Locklear celebrity photo as well as great stylist tips -point tips, no razor, etc. Other girlfriends also gave advice. Karen told me the right products to use to bring out the curl. Lisa warned about getting layers cut too short.

I cautiously presented the celebrity hairstyle to my stylist/student April. Would it be too difficult for a student? Could I expect a somewhat complicated cut for $10? And, would they think I was delusional and actually thought I'd look exactly like Heather Locklear when I left there?!

But, I felt like I had my girlfriends with me. I explained to April and her instructor that the hairstyle and advice came from my girlfriends. They understood and came up with a plan. A few hours later, I walked out with a very nice cut. I'm no Heather Locklear (it would take several million dollars of plastic surgery and a small miracle for that!) but I can't wait to go show my girlfriends. In fact, I'm going to see Tina this afternoon at her pillow shop. I'm sure she'll approve.

Sure, in the big scheme of things - haircuts are minor (well, kind-of!). Aren't you glad girlfriends are there for the little and the BIG stuff? Where would we be without girlfriends? Lonely, bored, poorly dressed and with a bad hair cut?

Girlfriends are instant face(and attitude)-lifts, as well as always making it a good hair day! Female friends reduce stress, make us healthier and happier. And, girlfriends are great for giving advice and for helping us through little and big life decisions. Be the girlfriend you want to be! Make your girlfriends feel special, loved and beautiful. You'll come out feeling as stylish as Heather Locklear, without those pesty paparazzi!

Girlfriends make great Neighbors and Neighbors make great Girlfriends!

Little did I know when I found this house eight years ago, that I'd also find a street full of Girlfriends! There's Judy, Anne, Ann (and two former neighbors named Ann!), Karen, Stephanie, Jane, Genevieve, Dolly, Peggy, Sunny, Marilyn, Eula, Pam, Lori, Megan and a whole host of other great neighbors (including great friends and former neighbors Ellen and Dana!). I'm a lucky home-owner on a very nice street.

Today is my neighbor and fortunately my very good friend Anne's birthday. We can see what is on her TV and call to her from the front porch - and usually she is up for coming over, having neighborhood celebrations and hanging out for a glass of wine and conversation. She checks on the dog when we're out of town, waters plants and lets me invite myself over if I'm out of wine and need some girlfriend conversation! I feel so lucky to have a close friend that, well, close!

Do you know your neighbors? Can you borrow a cup of sugar or ask a favor of women in your neighborhood? Start a book club or walking group. Organize a street yard sale or happy hour. Sometimes it even helps to ask them for a favor and make it clear that you'll reciprocate. Women like to help each other out - give them that opportunity and make sure you look for ways to return the favor. Having girlfriends nearby is great! And having great girlfriends across the street makes me a very blessed person! Thanks Anne and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!

p.s. If you live in Cincinnati and you need a good realtor, let me know and I'll connect you with Anne, the birthday girl and top realtor!

How clean does your house need to be for girlfriends?

Hmmm ... what are your thoughts? Do girlfriends feel welcome in your home at any time and in any condition? Do YOU feel comfortable with visiting female friends when you haven't mopped in too long to remember? Can girlfriends just stop by without warning?

My girlfriends are coming over tomorrow night. Yep, I'm blogging and Paula, Becky, Judy, Melody, Ruth Sara and Tina will be here this time tomorrow night. Yes, I could clean but I also know that they love me regardless of cobwebs and pet hair. (Plus I can hide some of the mess in closets and behind shut doors!)

Isn't it wonderful when you have female friends who are family? They can make themselves at home, know where the bathroom is and where to find paper if it runs out!

Invite your girlfriends over and don't worry about how clean things are or aren't. Girlfriends are meant to relieve stress, not cause it. Just enjoy your time together. You'll be so glad you did - and that you didn't need to clean after all!

Look around ... are your girlfriends nearby?

From my messy little office/studio, I am surrounded by so many things that remind me of my girlfriends. There are photos of my creative roomies Vicki, Lisa and Phyllis; my SCD buddies who inspire me Katie, Jill, Paula and Marie; and my supportive 'sister' girlfriends like Cath, Amy, Kate and Kleta. Gifts and cards from Vicki, Joan and Barb. Books from (and by!) Renee, Marie, Katie and Lisa. I feel like I'm 'hugged' by great girlfriends even in my little, lonely studio!

More than the 'stuff' on the walls and shelves, are the memories that seeing the photos and items bring to mind. Sharing with Katie and Lisa (like we'll do tomorrow for our mastermind group), laughing with Jill (which we did today on the phone), sharing a room with Vicki (who didn't know she snores!) ... friendships and the memories from them can keep me going through hard times, sleepless nights and lonely hours.

Do you have special reminders of your girlfriends around your office, bedroom or closet? Are there photos of your female friends in your wallet or framed around your home? May your surroundings surround you with reminders of female friends and happy times together. Aren't girlfriends great?!

Why a Blog? And why Girlfriendology???

Research indicates that women NEED female friendships - and that having girlfriends reduces stress and even makes us live longer*. The goal of Girlfriendology is to inspire, appreciate and celebrate girlfriends across the globe. In fact, I believe that having friendships with women in different areas of our city or the world makes us care more about them and be more compassionate, caring, peace-minded and involved. (And what better way to connect long distance than the world wide web?!)

Research also shows that women are catching up with men on internet usage and that we communicate online differently than men. (Dah!) We tend to share more of our lives with each other through email and blogs. Women's friendships are growing through the previously male-dominated internet. Combine all these facts and a blog is the perfect way to share stories, inspiration and ideas for female friendships.

Personally, this Girlfriendology blog has raised my awareness and appreciation of my girlfriends. Updates are inspired by the wonderful women who influence, interact with and care about me. (And I have more inspiring women than even time to blog about you all!) Only a blog can capture the on-going lessons of life and special moments with girlfriends which caused me to start Girlfriendology in the first place!

So, THANKS GIRLFRIENDS for inspiring me and for reminding me why it is so important to make sure we give attention, time, love and support to our great girlfriends.

Do you have female friends who have impacted your life? From giving thoughtful gifts, to cheering you up, to being a fun friend to hang out with - girlfriends make our lives special, happier and even healthier. Call up your girlfriends and get together. Then come back to Girlfriendology and share stories! Celebrate the amazing girlfriends in your life!

* Read more about this: The Tending Instinct, by Shelley Taylor

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If you're creative or 'crafty,' stop by GirlfriendologyToo for the creative side of girlfriends! I'm just growing this site of 'the creative side of inspiration, appreciation and celebration of girlfriends' and I welcome your creative comments!

Entrepreneurial Girlfriends & Reducing Stress!

Great things happen when you share what is on your mind and in your dreams with other girlfriends!

At our monthly entrepreneurial girlfriends group today, Judy confessed that her creative brain is always busy and she has LOTS of ideas for businesses she could start. (And, she's right!)

From someone who knows personally, creative women sometimes get overwhelmed with innovative ideas and an excess of dreams. And, add a busy life with a full-time job, family and trying to follow our dreams 'on the side,' and you can end up with a whole mess of stress!

Meeting with other girlfriends and discussing your ideas, challenges and dreams is therapeutic. It just feels much better to know that others struggle with the same things and that encouragement and feedback are offered with a loving voice.

Thanks Judy for sharing your dreams and for helping me on my way to mine. I look forward to being your girlfriend through whatever creative, entrepreneurial roads we follow. I feel better, lighter and more focused - thanks to you!

Do you meet with your girlfriends to discuss your dreams? If not, should you?! Add a comment if you have a dream you'd like to get input on from helpful, caring female friends or tell about girlfriend groups and how they've helped you. I bet your stress level is much lower because of your great gal pals!

* Sorry about the bad photo Judy! I'm just learning how to work my new phone camera! I'll get you another time! Check out Judy's blogs: PublishSmart and Blind Hog Press.

Bartering ideas and dreams ... the girlfriend way.

I offered to pay my friend Karen for consulting. She has knowledge that I want, so of course I wanted to compensate her for that - as I should. She, being the sweetheart that she is, suggested that we meet for dinner and I could buy and she could share. What a perfect barter!

Dinner tonight was informative and interesting, filling and fun! I believe we both had a wonderful evening. We shared goals/strategies that I know we'll cheer for each other for years to come.

Do you have a girlfriend you trust and admire their opinion? Invite them to dinner to give you a new perspective on things. Or, if you have a friend who needs some encouragement in reaching their dreams (and you're the positive, supportive friend who can help!), plan time together - soon.

Girlfriends don't age - they reduce age (and they reduce stress!). Girlfriends don't discourage - they stand up and cheer for you even when you don't feel like there is anything to feel good about. Be the girlfriend you want to be! (Thanks Karen!!)

Counting your girlfriend blessings ...

My girlfriend Renee and I caught up over dinner on Monday night. On Sunday night, upon arriving in Cleveland, she drove her rental car toward the hotel. But, before she could arrive, she was hit by a car on the highway, spun around, hit by another car, spun some more and finally ended up on the other side of the rush hour, busy highway. Miraculously, she walked away from the accident without a scratch but definitely very shaken up and frightened.

As she recalled the event, I couldn't help but take a personal, albeit self-centered, view of the terrible event. I would have been so incredibly hurt and sad had something happened to her. In that moment of sharing, I went inside to feel incredibly blessed to know her and to have her safely sitting next to me that evening. It brought a sense of wanting to hold on to her and not let her out of my sight. It was a blinding reminder to care for and stay close to the amazing female friends who bless my life just by being my friends.

Renee, I'm so happy you're okay and want only good things for you. And, again selfishly, I want to spend MANY more happy, fun, creative times together. To me, you are perfect and I just want to be around you as much as I can. (Can I move in with you and Danny?!)

I'm blessed that nothing happened to my dear friend but hopefully the accident will encourage me (and possibly you) to cherish your girlfriends. Have a friend who you should tell how special she is to you? Lost touch with someone whom you love and don't want to grow away from? Call. Write. Visit. Send a note. Count your girlfriend blessings - every one of the amazing women in your life!

Bonus Girlfriends!

Hello from Cleveland. I'm here to tape a few videos for A.C. Moore. (Craft chain stores that tape/show demo videos in their stores.) I arrived to be very surprised to see a dear girlfriend - Julianna Hudgins (she's as sweet and fun as she is pretty). She had taped earlier in the day and was just on her way out but we got to catch up - and it was great.

Isn't it fun when you see a girlfriend you haven't seen in a long time and you pick up right where you left off?! It is a gift to have girlfriends like this and I'm blessed to have arrived early enough to have a little time to visit with her.

Now it is off to dinner with another great, hilarious girlfriend - Renee Sparks. She is the host of the A.C. Moore videos and we've taped together on QVC, worked together on projects and just have a wonderful connection.

I've said it before - I'm blessed with great girlfriends. I hope you are too. Who do you need to reconnect with? What girlfriends do you need to call just to laugh together? Call. Connect. Be the girlfriend you want to be. Then celebrate the great gift of girlfriends!

We're the latest (and greatest!) trend!

The Atlanta America's Mart (Gift Mart) states that "girlfriend gifts are a leading trend that shows no sign of slowing down." Actually, I think they're missing the lifestyle trend that keeps going - that female friends value each other and want to show their appreciation for their girlfriends with gifts and attention. Does that surprise you?! No!

Female friends have a special bond that we biologically need - to spend time with and celebrate our girlfriends. That is what Girlfriendology is all about. Based on this, and my 'crafty' background, I have started a second blog to focus more on the creative side of Girlfriendology - GirlfriendologyToo which has ideas on girlfriend gifts and greetings you can make, as well as updates from the craft/hobby industry to keep up with materials, techniques and other trends.

And, in keeping with the trends, I'll be flying to Atlanta in September to go to the America's Mart and look for girlfriend gifts for Girlfriendology. A perfect girlfriend gift is already being designed for Girlfriendology by a top jewelry designer - Jill MacKay - she's a great girlfriend of mine. (Look for her jewelry findings in JoAnns stores, etc.!) And more fun things are coming!

Join in on the survey of your favorite gifts to give/receive from girlfriends. I'll share the results and any comments, ideas, great stories that you have to share. And celebrate your girlfriends with gifts and special events together!

YEAH! & Happy Birthday!!!

I can't talk about LL Cool J (who is off in Vegas right now - good luck!) without calling out my other great girlfriend who has wonderful news! YEAH! ANGIE IS MOVING BACK! Whoo Hoo! We can't wait to have you back in town!! YEAH!

And, three other girlfriends are celebrating birthdays this coming week ... so HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Sunday - Happy Birthday Dana! We still miss you on the street but love that you and your fun family come back and visit a lot. Let's get together soon!

Monday - Happy Birthday Kate! We miss being up in MN near you and look forward to seeing you in a couple weeks. Have a fun birthday!

Tuesday - Happy Birthday Barb! We miss you guys too. We'll see you soon when we're up visiting. I hope all is well with the family and your girlfriend group, etc.

So, Angie, Dana, Kate & Barb - thanks for being my girlfriends! That alone is reason to celebrate! Consider yourself hugged!!!

Bookless Book Club - no stress girlfriend groups!

Thursday night was our monthly neighborhood women's book club. We don't believe in adding stress to any one's life, so reading the book is always optional. Hanging out with your neighborhood female friends is all that is required. In fact, in the summer we take a month off from books and just exchange magazines. It is a no-stress way to recycle and read new publications. And always a fun night!

As we sat in Judy's beautiful backyard garden, we caught up on life. Anne's new bra - partly to blame for that salsa drip on her shirt! Retired and with a social calendar to make us all dizzy, we heard about Peggy's target shooting at a police training camp. Four fatal shots in a row, we wondered how she got out of there without being recruited. Another Ann was taking a break from her infant to have some quality time with the neighborhood girlfriends. With a little nervousness, we heard about the snake in Judy's backyard the day before - right where we were sitting! Stories and updates kept us laughing all the way back down the street to our homes. It was a perfect night and a great neighborhood tradition.

Do you have a book club or neighborhood group? Do you meet up with other Moms or girlfriends on a regular basis? Please share your ideas and stories in this blog's comments.

And, if you don't have a group of women to get together with on a frequent basis, why don't you start one? It isn't hard and, like our 'bookless' book club, doesn't need to cost anything or add any stress. You don't even have to read a book. It could be a monthly gathering to discuss a new topic or a girls group dinner to try a new restaurant. I even heard about a group of women who get together to have dinner together and donate the money they would have spent going to a restaurant to a good cause - like Katrina homes or South African women. Go ahead. See what you can start!

Global Girlfriends?

In the past month I've met a traveling Australian woman, Sue, who was so lovely and wonderful I just met her and wanted her not to leave our home. Busi, a beautiful and spirit-filled South African woman, came to dinner and ended up serving us the most amazing love and joy. And, a woman from Germany stopped by the blog - I don't even know who she was (so I don't know or track specifically who you are!) but it amazed me to reach out to other countries.

This world-wide web of women has me thinking. How do women in other nations inspire, appreciate and celebrate their girlfriends? How can we learn from that? And, don't you think we women could change the world if we all knew each other? You always care more about people you know so if women joined together to care and love each other, and we have a HUGE influence on men/our families, and the problems of the world might come down to platforms or pumps, vegetarian or gourmet, paper or plastic and your deck for dinner or my block to walk?

You. Yes - YOU. Reach out. Influence three (or more) other women to expand their bounds of friends. Find a way to get to know females in other neighborhoods or countries. Invite a group of girlfriends over for dinner and build new friendships. Welcome new girlfriends into your world - especially when there are differences that you both bring to the table and leave you with a new understanding of other women.

And, when you do - share. Comment on this blog. Invite your girlfriends to visit Girlfriendology too. Together we CAN change the world. One girlfriend at a time.

Passionate Girlfriends - Meet Joan

My girlfriend JOAN KAUP is passionate about Cincinnati. She reminds everyone in her email signature to "say something positive about Cincinnati - today!" She lives this principle in everything she does - from living in Over the Rhine (a "financially/socially diverse" area downtown), to being involved in the arts and to running for City Council (which in our city is like a 13-member mayor group).

Tonight was a "Gallery Chat" with Joan. She shared her love for Cincinnati and her goals for making us a better town, home and travel destination. I love her passion to make this a better place, to improve life here for everyone - renters, home owners and visitors. She is creative, smart and oh so caring about our city. I am thrilled that she is running with the sincere desire to change and improve Cincinnati - it isn't an ego thing at all.

Isn't it wonderful how different girlfriends inspire you in unique and wonderful ways? Joan definitely challenges me to be more involved in improving my city/region. My friend Penny influences my intellectual ideas and creative opinions. My wonderful girlfriend Tina reminds me of the great stores and resources in my own neighborhood.

Girlfriends are a wonderful source of inspiration. Do you inspire your girlfriends? If so, how so? (Share in the comments or sign up for the Girlfriendology.com newsletter and have your ideas influence others.) Thanks to all the girlfriends who make me proud, who show me better ways to live and thank and, most of all, who inspire me. Through you, and your influence on me and others, we can change the world. Girlfriends rock!

Driving Solo with a Carload of Girlfriends

If you would have passed me on the drive back from CHA/Chicago yesterday, you would have thought I was all by myself. Not at all! Thanks for free mobile phone minutes (and a good hands-free headset), I made the five hour drive with three of my girlfriends.

My sister Cyndee took the first leg. We had to finish a conversation we'd started on my drive to Chicago. There were family issues to discuss, updates on my niece's dating life and my nephew's band competition.

Jill took over from there with things to catch up on - even though we had dinner the night before and talk as often as possible. These are important things - like her love life, my ideas for Girlfriendology gifts (teaser: something GREAT coming this holiday season!), missed updates on fellow designers and just fun memories that had us both laughing until we cried.

Once I hit Indianapolis, I gave Cath a call. Thank goodness for good cell phone coverage! We stopped briefly so I could get food/gas (plus we both had to go to the bathroom!) but then picked back up the conversation until I made it to my driveway.

What could have been a very long, boring drive was actually such a joy. I got to take my girlfriends along with me on the ride. Actually it was a traveling girlfriend therapy session!! Thanks girlfriends! You're welcome to ride with me any time!


p.s. Anyone out there have good stories to share on their girlfriends or requests for Girlfriend gifts, make a comment! I'd love to hear your thoughts and stories!!

Creative Girlfriends - Chicago CHA

Wow! That was a whirlwind two days! To Chicago and back for the CHA (Craft/Hobby Assn) tradeshow. If you're into crafts, love to make your own cards or just print an image on cloth and make a pillow out of it, this is THE spot to be to see the newest products and techniques. So inspiring!

To me, even more inspiring are the wonderful, creative girlfriends I have in this industry. They welcomed me into the group seven summer CHA's ago and every year is such a wonderful homecoming where I get to see and hug my creative 'sisters.' If you ever find a group of women who make you feel this welcome, you drive wherever to see them!

A few fun observations from the show:

* Everyone is blogging! Two of my favorite designers and girlfriends are hosting very popular blogs: Katie Hacker keeps beaders up to speed on the latest techniques and scoop in the beading/jewelry world. She's just so cool and creative! My friend, and great clay artist, Linda Peterson brought her fun, whitty and so patient daughter, Mariah, with her to the show. Donna Kato wasn't there (or I missed seeing you!) but is also an amazing clay designer. Check out just some of my creative girlfriends!

* Along that same note, technology has taken over the craft industry. Web sites have online craft shows like HowToTVOnline.com - check out my girl Katie in the jewelry segments! Epson was there with their great printers, scanners and technology solutions for everything from scrapbooking to those personalized pillows. There actually are too many to even go further and, after all, it was a long trip in the past two days!

So off to bed to rest up for the real world. I'll miss seeing my wonderful girlfriends tomorrow but I know we'll be together as soon as we can. (I'm taping with some of them next week in Cleveland so another road trip to see my creative girlfriends!) Enjoy your girlfriends! Every moment with them is precious! Good night!

Creative Girlfriend Reunion - so fun!

Hello from the CHA (Craft/Hobby Assn) tradeshow in Chicago! This is probably my 7th or 8th year of being here and every year I have met more amazing women who have become wonderful and inspiring girlfriends. It is so fun to walk the aisles and run into girlfriends.

So far I've seen Tammy, Susan, Mary Lynn, Jill, Marie, Linda, Diane and Vicki. If you knew these women, you'd know that they are all wildly creative, hilariously fun and super talented. (See why I love this bunch!) I can't even count the number of hugs I've received in the three hours I've been here. Now that is a great tradeshow!

Tonight is dinner with Jill and Marie. Tomorrow is breakfast with Katie and Lisa. And I still have more aisles to walk and friends to see.

Thanks to my designer, creative girlfriends for always making me feel so loved and welcome. I'm a lucky girl! Back to the show ...

Hangin' with LL Cool J

Okay, no. It isn't the rapper. I'm not that cool! I am cool enough (thankfully!) to have a girlfriend who is cool and still will hang out with me. Lisa J (aka: LL Cool J), another girlfriend - Katie and I met for lunch today. (I've totally given up on the 'no lunch' rule - remember it is actually "girlfriend therapy" and that is definitely worth the cost of a taco salad!)

LL Cool J and Katie are both younger than me (though I'll never admit how much!) and single. I'm basically an old, married, semi-boring friend. God love them if they don't make me feel so welcome and wanted, even if I don't have exciting date stories or the stamina to match them for late night beverages!

After lunch, LL Cool J called me to tell me she'd visited the blog, loved it and wondered if our lunch would make it into it. Well, here it is! Next time I'll take a photo so I can post your cool picture!

Diversity, be it age, ethnicity, social, financial or marital status, is such a great thing among girlfriends. That common bond of just enjoying each other's company, laughing together, sharing life together is, like Lisa, just cool!

I learn so much from my girlfriends - whether their older, younger, look like me, share my beliefs and status - or not. Personally I think that is one of the amazing benefits of spending time with female friends. Life is much better with a girlfriend to share it with.

Have a coworker or former coworker who you enjoy their personality? Remember an old friend who always made you laugh and feel appreciated? Know a girlfriend who could use a little attention and support? Pick up the phone. Email. Send a note. Reconnect. I know you'll discover how cool it is to be friends with them.

Lunch with Carole

Okay, so once again there goes my aforementioned 'no lunch out' rule! Today I had lunch with Carole, a co-worker who has become a good friend. She and I share a lot of corporate experiences (and often frustrations!), an interest in our city/cultural events, restaurants and movies, and more - including our entrepreneurial dreams.

I shared my passion for Girlfriendology and pursuing a business that connects women with their girlfriends to just make life better! She confided her future plans to open a B&B and to pursue her passion for food/cooking. (Having visited her B&B-ready home and tasted her cuisine, I know she has exactly what it takes to be successful!)

It's so nice to connect with a girlfriend. To find out you have more things in common. To learn little insights into their sense of humor, beliefs and even dreams. It was the first lunch we've shared together, but it won't be the last. And, throughout our corporate or entrepreneurial status, I have a girlfriend who will help me (gladly!) break my 'no lunch out' rule! Thanks Carole!

When girlfriends bless your life without even trying ...

I mentioned Char in the last blog. She hosted the amazing shower I was honored to attend on Saturday. Her home reflects her sunny personality and her warm nature. (And her dog is dang cute too!)

After reading the blog on Cyndi's shower, she shared the following quote with me:

When you believe that nothing significant can happen through you, you have said more about your belief in God than you have said about yourself.

Henry T. Blackaby & Claude King, Experiencing God

Without knowing it, she encouraged me to follow my dream of inspiring women to appreciate and celebrate their girlfriends. And, definitely without intending it, I received it on the exact day that another girlfriend needed for me to share it. She is at a crossroads and that quote gave her 'goosebumps.' It confirmed to her that she is moving in the right direction and that she needs to believe in herself.

So, again - thanks Char! And thanks to all the fabulous female friends who offer up encouragement to their girlfriends. You'll never know the ripple effects that your comments start and the difference that your positive energy has on your girlfriends and their friends. Now that is significant!

The Girlfriend Quilt (at a baby shower??)

A first-time expectant mom in her early forties, Cyndi was the focus of a fun baby shower yesterday. Her friends Char and Kim hosted the lovely lunch/shower and about a dozen plus girlfriends were on-hand to celebrate this joyous occasion.

Cyndi was not only surrounded by a mini-mountain of gifts, she was surrounded by her girlfriends from all areas of her life - former and current coworkers and neighbors, women she shared rides to work with or grew up knowing, girlfriends she'd made along the way. She has grown quite a league of girlfriends in her lifetime and how wonderful for us to all meet each other.

Driving away I thought about the different women I'd met. From a young mom with newborn nursing to grandmothers and professional executives, all walks of life and different professional/social status. I know that having us all together was most fun for Cyndi. She wanted us to meet each other, to connect and to know her better by the women in her life. The image of a quilt came to mind. Various segments of cloth, all beautiful in their own way but also very different. However, when joined together, form a gorgeous tapestry of color and pattern, a beautiful piece of art.

Cyndi is wrapped in this beautiful girlfriend 'quilt.' Surrounded by love and laughter. Warmed by friendship and support. Hugged by arms of forever friends and women who celebrate this wonderful miracle going on in her and her husband Jim's lives. And all of us are blessed to be sewn together by knowing Cyndi and equally warmed by her friendship.

Thanks Cyndi (and Char and Kim!) for bringing us all together. And, most of all, for sharing your life with us. We're the lucky ones! (And we can't wait to meet baby Daniel!)

We are Powerful Beyond Measure!

At my recent entrepreneurial girlfriend's group we very candidly shared the fear we experience when we set high goals or stretch ourselves. I remembered the following quote but obviously couldn't share it verbatim, so ...

for Becky, Tina, Joyce, Judy, Paula and other females with high ambitions and big dreams:

By Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?"

Actually, who are you NOT to be?

You are a Child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are born to manifest the glory that is within us. And, as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

(Thanks Marianne!)

Girlfriends all over the place!

I love big cities! The energy, the styles, the diversity, the food!! And I love walking and people watching in big cities.

I was in Chicago last weekend and I noticed something else that I love. It doesn't take very long to see girlfriends - walking, talking, laughing, shopping, just enjoying time with each other. From little girls and their moms on the way to/from the American Girl store, to white-haired women in comfy shoes tracking through the city together, to business women taking a break from work by sitting outside and sharing their professional and personal lives ... each friendship is to be appreciated and enjoyed as a gift.

There is definitely a positive energy that happens when girlfriends connect. We feel more alive, more ourselves, completely loved and accepted for who we are.

Look around. What friendships do you notice? What do you feel when you're with your girlfriend(s)? Content? Happy? Inspired? Blessed? Enjoy your friends. Appreciate each moment. Big city or small town, spend time with the wonderful women you are blessed with as friends. Life is good!

Girlfriend Therapy - with a cup of water, please

Okay, now I'm just getting spoiled! Two weeks ago my girlfriend Becky ("The Kitchen Goddess!") and I met for lunch to discuss doing Girlfriend Dinner Parties. (Wouldn't that be a blast!) Last week, I called her on a bad day and she dropped everything to meet me for lunch again. This week, on a kinda uncertain week for her, we met again for lunch.

As I left for lunch and thought about this new 'schedule,' I felt the guilt I was raised on to save money and that I had planned (once my girlfriend Angie left the company!) to not go out to lunch anymore. Okay, granted we do a pretty cheap restaurant, but in principle I wondered if I was breaking my own 'budgetary rule' and if that was a bad thing.

NAWWW! It took just a second to reclassify 'lunch' into 'girlfriend therapy.' Our weekly chats have been just what I (and hopefully Becky) needed to de-stress, laugh and just share our lives together. I believe we actually NEED time with our girlfriends and any opportunity to be together should be grabbed and celebrated.

So, thanks Becky for our lunches and conversations. Thanks for sharing and caring. And thanks for always giving great advice and sending me back to work in a MUCH better mood than I would have been with another Lean Cuisine in the lunchroom!

Call a girlfriend. Make a date. Coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, a walk, shopping, hanging out and watching Oprah - whatever you can fit into your schedule. Do it. (now!) Then post your comments and ideas for more "Girlfriend Therapy." (And it is much cheaper and fun than a going to a real therapist!)

Family Traditions - with Girlfriends who become Family!

This was the third year that I have accepted the invitation from my fun friend Penny to join in on her street 4th of July event. 150-200 current and former neighbors (and random friends of neighbors, like me!) lined the street dressed in red, white and blue. After reciting the Pledge of Allegiance and trying to sing every patriotic song (lead by a retired military General!), the kids race decorated bikes down the street with the General marching to a boombox of more music. It is Americana on the perfect day to be an American!

I love this tradition. Partly for the hilarious kids and wonderful celebration, but also very much because my friend Penny is family. She borrows/shares things, speaks her mind on politics and books, hosts celebrations thoughout the year, feeds us and equally feels comfortable in our home or with us in hers. Without planning it, she has become a lifelong friend with whom I hope to share this wonderful 4th of July tradition as long as physically possible!

Do you have a girlfriend who is closer than any family members? Or a special group of female friends who have become your sisters? Count yourself very lucky and blessed. And, when invited to get together or do something kinda 'family-ish' - do it! You can never have too many girlfriends and you can't buy the kind of support and love that you will find when you let a girlfriend into your life as part of your family! (Thanks Penny! Looking forward to next year already!)

Guaranteed Stress Reliever - seriously!

It has been a stressful week. Employee/boss issues (not fun!), having too much to do and not enough time to do what I really want to do (build Girlfriendology!), and family challenges combined for an elevated stress level.

UCLA researcher Shelley Taylor (author of The Tending Instinct) and her team studied stress in women. (Previous studies were only on men!) They found that oxytocin is released with stress. For men, the response is 'fight or flight.' For women it is much different. Women react to stress with a need to 'tend and befriend.' We want to tend to our young and be with our girlfriends. (My oxytocin level was HUGE this past week!)

Thursday night was our monthly women-only book club. We shared appetizers, desserts, sangria and some (albeit minimal!) discussion of the book. Mostly we 'befriend' each other. Our conversations cover new restaurants nearby, houses bought/sold on the street, funny stories of kids, helpful things like a good handyman or special event in the neighborhood. If the windows are open, our laughter is heard several houses away. We even share sad, difficult news - because life is that way too sometimes.

At the end of an always fun evening, we return to our homes with tales of neighbors and community updates. 'Magically' my mind had left the stressful work worries and other challenges. I was renewed in my passion for creating Girlfriendology and hoping to help women build community with each other - as a priority and a fabulous biological characteristic of women.

I didn't get The Tending Instinct on the book list for next month, however I did experience the stress relief that comes only from being with my girlfriends. Thanks wonderful women of East Hyde Park for reducing my oxytocin level and for being the kind of girlfriends who really make this community home.

Girlfriends ... the umbrella of bad stuff?

I was completely honest with my girlfriends in our weekly get-together last night. (Yes, weekly - we are a priority and it is definitely worth it! THANKS Paula's (2!), Becky, Melody, Ruth Sara, Tina and Judy.)

It has been a tough week. Work is much more difficult than it should be and I'm desperately trying to get Girlfriendology (coming soon!) up and running - ASAP! My girlfriends are so supportive and loving. They are my cheerleaders and inspiration.

Right in line with our discussion on dealing with challenges and going through 'stormy' times, the clouds rolled in and the sky got really dark. As I drove home under a HUGE gray cloud, I could see clear sky in the distance. I just happened to be under the clouds at that moment but, like with my tough times, that would be temporary. And they helped me remember that.

Do you have a friend who you need be their 'umbrella' from the storms that life sometimes brings? Or, are you under a cloud yourself? Reach out to your girlfriends. Even if it rains on you or them, it is much more fun to be under an umbrella with a girlfriend who loves you.

Looking for the good ... in a not so good time

Beautiful, talented, smart, funny and kind are just a few wonderful descriptions of my friend Dana. College buddies, we've gone through moves, changes and challenges since we graduated. Our friendship has endured and grown - which is such a blessing to me.

It is so tough to see her fight cancer again. I wish I could do anything to help her or even take her mind off things for a while. I so much want to say just the right thing.

A girlfriend of her's recently had the perfect response to her situation. She asked Dana, "I know the bad stuff going on, but what good things are going on in your life?" It relieved Dana from talking about treatment and thinking about her great husband, Bear (another college buddy). It took her mind off the reality of work and trying to keep her energy during a stressful chemo season. It reminded her of the beautiful home, wonderful life and so many loving friends that she has. (I wish I'd said it - but I'm so glad someone did!)

So Dana, thanks for reminding me to remember the good things. And thanks for teaching me to, if needed, help you remember the good things too. (And thanks for being one of the very good things in my life. I love you - you are my sister.)

Get Well Wishes ...

My fabulous friend Cathy is recovering from surgery. I got the message it all went well, but I can't wait to talk with her and get her version of that! I hope she is resting comfortably, that her family is taking great care of her and that she has good drugs when/if she needs them.

How have you tended to a girlfriend who has been sick? Have you written cards? Visited? Sent or delivered flowers? Showed up with a can of chicken soup and a couple chick flick DVDs?

Great girlfriends deserve pampering and I'd love to do that for Cath - and hope to when she's up to visitors. Let me know what you've done (or had done for you) for taking care of your girlfriends. Be well, dear friend!

Boating along with Ellen

My girlfriend Ellen (and her husband, Doug) have a boat and last night we joined them on the Ohio River. Threatening rain, we braved it and went out for an evening together.

As we sat in the back and let the boys drive and talk, we caught up on life. Her cute kids, our work challenges, upcoming travels, fashionable belts and painting our toenails - important stuff! Just things you share when you share life with someone - no matter how often or seldom you get to spend time together.

As we pulled into the dock at the end of the night, the rain started - perfect timing! We docked, covered up the boat and ran for our cars. It was a perfect evening. We had shared laughs, concerns, wishes, our lives. And our time together will be another memory that we'll share - together.

What can you do to create a memory for yourself and a friend? What event, fun plans, 'sharing opportunity' should you take advantage of? Go for it! Even in the rain, the great memories take place when you're together. Don't miss out on any of them - especially among girlfriends!

So nice to talk with a girlfriend ...

As we walked to the Greekfest last night (an annual tradition!), my college roommate best friend Barb and I walked ahead of the group so we could catch up. Between conversations ranging from underwear to husbands, the satisfaction of growing flowers to what her kids are up to, we reconnected (as we always do).

I love those times. When I can just be myself and know that my girlfriend will understand, listen, care, share and be there for me. In my opinion, there is nothing so wonderful as connecting with a dear friend.

Our underwear and husbands are different, as are the flowers in our gardens but we always feel so close and connected. Who do you need to reconnect with? What conversations could you have over a nice walk and talk together? Call. Phone. Email. Plan. Girlfriends are worth it. (Thanks Barb!)

Girlfriends Unite ...

My wonderful girlfriend Becky is a self-proclaimed 'foodie.' She (aka: "The Kitchen Goddess"!) is a personal chef, food demo'er, instructor, even radio personality. She knows food and serves our girlfriend group meals on a regular basis. (She is a wonderful friend to have!)

Today we decided to join forces - combing The Kitchen Goddess and Girlfriendology. Together we'll host girlfriend dinner parties with personalized menus, cooking lessons and other fun girlfriend get-together surprises. (Maybe a massage before dinner, then you and your girlfriends have dinner together in your robes???)

What ideas do you have on fun get-togethers we can do? What fun events have you hosted or attended with your girlfriends? Isn't it always worth the time and effort?!?!